superdutz@gmail.com
Inori & friends get into all sorts of trouble with their busts at their first Expansion Fest event, how will the girls end up looking by the end of it all?
Commission for & using OCs of Akemi Expansions
Average Scores:
- Overall: 3.60
- BE: 3.80
- Characters: 3.20
- Technical: 3.20
BoobAnchor
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 3, Technical= 4
Over the last years I've never commented on a story but this author is pretty fantastic so I wanted to try and help provide some feedback
The first descriptions of the characters and even up to the point of being stamped into the fest I basically skipped as it offered no value to me and seemed to drag on. Once transformations began however, I enjoyed greatly the method of delivery and creativity in those portions of the story. Some parts were hard to appreciate though as for every two descriptions I read, I felt like an additional description conflicted with my original understanding. First their boobs were giant medicine balls, then they were average D cups, back to back breaking, and again to just barely stretching their bras. With that it was difficult to follow the progression of size but I still really loved the concept and also the previous stories I've read on here so I'm definitely looking forward to the next installment but hopefully it'll be easier to imagine sizes and compare where everyone is in reference to each other as the story progresses.
Keep up the good work of expanding chests!
brit
Overall= 1, BE= 3, Characters= 1, Technical= 1
Too many extra words. Lots of unnecessary details about the girls, their car, their trip, how excited they are, etc. It was just hard to read and clunky. Honestly, I couldn't even get to the interesting bits because i couldn't follow the story at all.
Shulkie
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
An amazing story my friend. Your characters popped and sizzled with expression and impact. The story was entirely driven on not just the expansion, but the characters and how they dealt with it afterwards. If I had only one gripe with the story it was that I was curious how things settled after the concert. Thanks for your hard work.
Dudesummons
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 4
This story is fantastic, and now I'm sad I don't have something similar to read. Another expansion festival would be great. Different girls or the same, maybe even expanding the festish perview.
Guest
Overall= 2, BE= 2, Characters= 2, Technical= 2
Giant Paragraphs are not fun to read.
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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