The Overflowing Bra

Well written and technically better than most on this site.

Enjoyed the story quite a bit.
Interesting world you've got there. I hope to see more.

You consistently have some of the most interesting transformations I've read! On top of that, you have a fair sense of story and the technical aspects of your writing are quite excellent as well. I look forward to more of your work, you have no idea how excited I was when I saw that you'd started posting again a few years back!

Speaking about the chapter itself, the transformations in this segment were very well done, and Maggie's infection was an interesting way to raise the stakes. I love her burgeoning relationship with Josie and can't wait to see where things go for them. That said, I'm a little down on how unconcerned the cast seems about collateral damage. I get that in the world magical mishap is a thing, but they're really blase' about it.

As much as I like the infection, I'm also a bit 'eh' about it. I reread the whole thing to see if there were any other signs that things were odd, and it really does seem like it comes out of no where. True, Maggie's behavior changes but, like she believed, it's easy to write it off as frustration or maybe even rebellion after a bad relationship ending. Once her infection is revealed, everyone knows about it and it makes me wonder why no one let Maggie know that such a thing was possible before she slept with Vance. Even a hint of the infection being in the area while she was at the clinic in chapter two would have been enough to make it not seem like it came out of no where.

That said, these are hindsight issues that aren't exactly evident when writing knowing that you'll end up at X.

Another point from my reread is that the cast is, on the whole, consistent and their characters each stand as their own, even if a little archetype shows through. Despite my misgivings, I generally like them.