First, thanks to all. If there was a way to respond privately to comments, I would, but haven't had enough time to find it.
#1 - It's a fair cop; this is a BE site, and any story that doesn't have sufficient BE should more properly be posted at Literotica, or something like that (though they've rejected everything I've ever sent, at least at first). Problem is, all the principle characters are already 'plumped' up, so aside from doing the guys (there may be a market for that, but it's not me...;) once everyone's sufficiently buxom, the story should by rights end. I'll do better with the next one, promise.
#2 - Yes, the story came to a halt when I checked the page count, and went "Holy @#$%, I'm at a hundred pages!" Figuring I'd already 'jumped the shark', I was more concerned that no one would read a 215k 'conclusion'. But apparently I'm wrong (and that's actually a good thing...;)
Then too, I have this concept that pr0n and violence don't really belong in the same story; I originally killed off one of the guards, then thought better of it, and just knocked him out. There's nooks and crannies where another story could fit in (In fact, I already have the idea for a third part for the duology, but I need to get 'If it had happened Otherwise' finished first. Heck 'otherwise' is a revist of an earlier story, just with different characters. I'll probably start 'fleshing out' the story this Wednesday.
Thanks again, those who have read it, and thanks for keeping me honest.