The Definitive BE Story Archive

The Overflowing Bra

Power: Day 9
Jade learns a lot more on how lust affects her and how she can use it.  Then girls must deal with the fall out of Gwen.
Average Scores:

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5

I LOVE this storyline!! You take the time and actually take your readers into the characters head, unlike some authors that skimp on complex thinking. I will admit that sometimes this is good but, complex plots are fun too.
I also find your transformations very creative and pretty arousing as well!! PLEASE keep writing!!

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 4

Just got around to actually reading the story. Enjoyed it immensely.

Only suggestion I have is to rely on cup sizez as descriptions less.

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 4

Loved this story it is one of the best on the web. Keep up the good work.

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 5

i like your work and want to know how the story progresses. (Maby a side story of gwens un-life if she escapes, that would be cool.)

Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 4

Each installment gets better and better. Your grammer is improving. Not sure what exactly happend to Gwen. You may need to either revise the warehouse scene, or address it in your next chapters.

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 5

Awesome as usual, Tina's sister dieing was a bit of a downer though, hope the vampire gets what she deserves

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Rate this story from 1-5 stars (5 stars is best) in the following categories:

Overall Enjoyment(How much did you like the story overall?)
1 2 3 4 5

BE Description (Detail, quantity, quality)
1 2 3 4 5

Characters (Descriptions, likeability)
1 2 3 4 5

Technical Quality (Writing style, grammar, etc.)
1 2 3 4 5

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