The Definitive BE Story Archive

The Overflowing Bra

Devil's Kin
A mean female lawyer makes a deal with the devil but falls into his trap. This is one of my earliest works that I went back and fixed up. 
Average Scores:

Overall= 2, BE= 2, Characters= 2, Technical= 4

This is not a story but a situation, an introduction to a much larger idea. Disapointing.

Overall= 2, BE= 2, Characters= 1, Technical= 2

Needs a lot of work... Can't say much about what when one is 1/2 asleep, but it wasn't enthralling.

Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 3

Intersting introduction, I'll have to see the continuation before making a real decision

Overall= 3, BE= 1, Characters= 3, Technical= 4

Nice plot, but way to short. Unfortunatly incomplete.

Overall= 5, BE= 2, Characters= 4, Technical= 4

It has a lot of promise. I also think it needs to be longer to tease out the possibilities. For example returning her to the real world. What would the devil do to her there? It is a difficult one to rate because the length is the only real down side. The idea is superb. Thankyou for sharing it. I hope you add more.

Benji Dude
Overall= 3, BE= 2, Characters= 3, Technical= 3

A nice idea with lots of possibility, needs more to it though.

Overall= 3, BE= 2, Characters= 3, Technical= 3

Excellent beginning to an interesting story, but too abrupt and underwritten as is. I would be deeply interested to read, though, if you ever felt the urge to, ah... "flesh it out" a bit. So to speak.

Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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Rate this story from 1-5 stars (5 stars is best) in the following categories:

Overall Enjoyment(How much did you like the story overall?)
1 2 3 4 5

BE Description (Detail, quantity, quality)
1 2 3 4 5

Characters (Descriptions, likeability)
1 2 3 4 5

Technical Quality (Writing style, grammar, etc.)
1 2 3 4 5

Your comments on the story: