Please note that the whole story is posted at my new Patreon, for free, but you can of course decide to support me. My Patreon name is Moldyyouth. Summary: John is a calm, tall, handsome young man with a big dick. He gets a janitor position at a girls' school. Soon, he has a date with someone, but it doesn't end very well. After that, John becomes obsessed with increasing his penis size. Right now, the story is 47 pages long and will be continued further in the future. Breast expansion is not the main focus of the story, but there are two people who experience it. It is not the main fetish in the story, but I will, in the future, develop the fetish further. Main fetish is male straight slow penis growth. Please check my Patreon. I update the story each day.
Average Scores:
- Overall: 2.00
- BE: 1.33
- Characters: 1.67
- Technical: 1.00
Moldyyouth
Overall= 1, BE= 1, Characters= 1, Technical= 1
I know it's not good feedback nonetheless, I thank you for the feedback.
Yeah, English isn't my native language. Yeah, I know that the growth is too slow for many readers. Maybe the story is too ordinary, but that is intended. Maybe in the future I will look through the story again.
Bunny Moon
Overall= 4, BE= 2, Characters= 3, Technical= 1
I'm not a grammar cop and I'm sure there might be that English isn't the native language for the author, but there are some hard issues with gender her when they mean him etc...Spend a little more attention and please keep writing!
Wishing4More
Overall= 1, BE= 1, Characters= 1, Technical= 1
This was borderline impossible to read purely because of the formatting alone. Everything was so jumbled up and crammed together, loaded with spelling and grammar errors, it was a chore to get through. I was got the feeling this was written in a different language, but even if the translation was poor, the writing itself is a mess.
Full disclosure, I basically gave up reading it straight after the first few pages, and started skipping through looking for character names, so my assessment may seem unfair, but I don't think so. Read it for yourself, if you can.
The story itself is extremely meandering and rambling. There are too many characters that seemed to serve little purpose and a lot of unnecessary, irrelevant drama. Early on, there's a female doctor who kickstarts his growth story, and expresses interest in his pursuit. It made it seem like she was going to be the main catalyst for his transformation, but her name is written only once throughout the whole thing, and she's never seen nor mentioned again.
None of the characters have any meat to them. They're just a name and what they want, and it's difficult to care or picture any of them. It was impossible to keep track of who's who or why they're there. There's very little that makes anything or anyone interesting. I would have lost track of whom the main character was if the title didn't have his name. Again, I could be wrong, but everything is so poorly written and formatted, I couldn't tell.
There is very little growth in this story. I know it's supposed to be slow, but there's slow and then there's geologic speed. Not even an inch of penis nor bust was gained by anyone throughout all 47 incoherent pages.
I don't know if this story can be saved. I'm sorry, but saying anything else would be lying.
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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