The Overflowing Bra

I thought there was no way to ruin shrek

Don't quit your day job.

Ignore the previous comments, I don't know why they think that. It's a very hot story. I read it 3 times already. Good job!

Here's a small excerpt if you're curious what the other reviewers are talking about. It's so bad I don't even know where to start a constructive critique.



He hadn't better look out!
The other girls in the crowd laughed but the others continued laughing, and the atmosphere thickened. The crowd loved this. And the confused lousy peeps were their enemies. Natalie Davis, who had been looking for Fanny, was walking into the square. She picked up a few words. Tits. Tits. Tittytits! The words slapped like hanging boob. Jack looked up and tried to direct some of the hysteria away from Rose Mary Clarke. The first he thought of was. Now seated with her friends, Natalie did not find her. But neither did Jack, little do they know her that her and the beautiful blonde had been sweethearts since their teens.



This hasn't been chopped up or rearranged at all. Very little before or after would help explain the situation. I'd say it's about a 3.5 on the cuil scale, so almost nonsense but not quite.

This was frankly incomprehensible. General lack of narrative, many grammatical errors and missing punctuation.

Is this a joke?

I feel like there's something in there but honestly I have no clue what I just read