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Millie finds strange her younger sister is getting bigger and sexier than her so fast. But when her mom and neighbor are also changing, she wonders what is going on.
Average Scores:
- Overall: 4.00
- BE: 5.00
- Characters: 3.50
- Technical: 3.00
Mrmanandu
Overall= 3, BE= 5, Characters= 2, Technical= 1
This premise has a lot of potential. Unfortunately, a lot of technical writing problems hold it back.
The story is rife with grammatical errors and unnatural language. I imagine this was translated from another language. It's also becomes too ambitious for it's own good.
What starts as a simple erotic mystery about the woman around the protagonist becoming more voluptuous becomes a complicated tale of magic, deception, and doublecrossing. It doesn't need any of this and it definitely dilutes the original premise.
Paula
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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