The third installment. I ask for a bit of leeway about the rules of the universe here. I fudged it in the last story, and I'm pretty sure I did it again.
Either way, Bethany starts taking charge of her curse, and starts making it work for her. The waif from Part II never knew what hit her!
Average Scores:
- Overall: 5.00
- BE: 5.00
- Characters: 5.00
- Technical: 4.50
Guy
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
Mitch
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 4
This author is formally known as TheFisk here on TOB. There were some mistakes here and there, but hot damn I loved this. I hope you write more!
I would like more emphasis on the breast growth it's why we're all here, but this was MY cup of tea! The characters are good and are even fleshed out a bit!
Yeah, the mythology is a bit flubbed, but you clearly tossed that out for Rule of Cool, which is fine. You fixed the error in the last story, and the jump you made here is fine considering the foundation you put down.
I hope you write more and more often!
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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