A very studious girl, the pride of her parents, find a magical lamp... maybe she's not such a good girl as even she thought she was.
Average Scores:
- Overall: 4.67
- BE: 4.33
- Characters: 4.00
- Technical: 4.33
Knightwolf1785
Overall= 4, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
I have something better for one of her wishes. That her parents got found out by someone in the family and turned over to the police.
BoobityBoob
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 3, Technical= 4
For someone whos not a native English speaker, your spelling is on point for nearly the whole thing. You have a few errors but they are so minor they barely detract from the story. I would suggest just giving a quick once over with spell check or have someone else read it before hand. I loved the story by the way, a really enjoyable read. The only real criticism I can think of would be to add more descriptions to people. Even a basic one would help establish them and make the scene easier to visualise. I look forward to reading more of your work in the future.
SomeGuy
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
Due to comment spam, any new posts with http in them will be destroyed.
