The Overflowing Bra

The story itself was simplistic and boring.  The characters were one-dimensional and just not at all interesting.  The plot itself was stupid to begin with... There was zero believability to the conflict!  I mean seriously, who lives in FEAR of their friends and coworkers getting rude with them over their choice in drinks?  Seriously, this has never happened to this extent where it was a haunting curse that EVERYONE in all social situations have made fun of this poor sap for his choice in "foo foo drinks" (as we call them here).
I just found myself hating the main character, and hating the coworkers.
The dialogue was forced... the story moved in odd spurts and sputters, almost like you got bored with parts and didn't want to flesh things out where it really needed it... but then it got boring in other parts where you give unnecessary detail...
The BE was almost laughable.

Was really enjoying this right up to the transphobic "cross dressing man sneaking into
womens restroom" bit. 

Good narrative flow and story structure. I like the change in tone of the prose overall with bimboification, character and dialogue were simplistic and a little forced but who reads porn for insightful character development anyway, right? Plus, mysterious and magical bartenders are awesome plot devices, oh yeah!

This was a fun story. It's written about as well and intriguing as you can get for a story this short. Perfect for someone who just wants a quick fool around sort of read and good potential for more to come.
I felt some of the changes were too sudden at times. I like that the changes are gradual, but some of those changes can just happen instantly while others slowly develop, and how much changes per transformation varies a lot. Some consistency would've helped, but it's enough to set up a simple sex romp. This shows promise.