The Definitive BE Story Archive

The Overflowing Bra

Rise of the Cat Women: Part 5
Of which Keith tells Katie all about the cat women; Keith starts his new job at the animal clinic; Sandra and Katie meet; and Keith's rather unpleasant brother, Sam, makes an appearance.
Average Scores:

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5

Absolutely amazing. Great creativity, great characters, great writing style. Some of the very best on this site. I look forward to more!

Overall= 3, BE= 5, Characters= 2, Technical= 4

I must say this has been a pretty nice little set of stories you wrote. However in this chapter there is a big...HUGE glaring problem with how you portrayed your characters. I normally wouldn't let one of these situations bother me so much...but it was so jaring that it has to be mentioned.

Yes Sam came off as the king of all jerks, he terrorized his brother for years and said a lot of bad things and hurt one of the kittens a bit....but does he really deserve what happened to him. Or should I say her? seeing how Samantha the cat woman and Sam the human male are completely different people. I am going solely on how you wrote the rules of how your universe work and how your characters act to base this off of...

Samantha shows up on Sandra's doorstep begging to be let into her pride, crying her eyes out, very much not acting like the person she was before. You even wrote that Sandra thought Samantha was being sincere. She even sold off everything she had to give right to her new master....and you give her thees kinds of restrictions? Where love making is a very important part of strengthening bonds between her denigh her of that? Giving her zero chance for redemption? You would forever make her an outsider in her own family? All sense of Sandra being this kind hearted loveing sole is compleatly shattered in this instant, making her into a mean, spiteful, vindictive, cruel person who just to make this poor girl suffer. Sam the dooshbag is dead....Samantha the cat woman is taking the full brunt of his actions. How is that even remotely even close to fair? Yes be cautious, yes have these restrictions to make sure she won't turn on her or the kittens, but how it stands right now, Sandra has no intentions on ever lifting her punishment (yes I understand that her sleeping with her former brother would be creapy and weird. I am mainly talking about having ANY contact with the other girls)

Shouldn't this be the chance to have Sandra show signs of compassion or mercy, being the bigger person or any of that? Am I really supposed to support Sandra's choice in punishing a girl who herself hasn't done anything wrong? Oh wait she used to be a guy who did some bad things...even though there isn't even a trace left in her. As I see it; Sandra isn't looking too much better than male Sam...

Please try and keep this in mind when writing your next chapter. I got a tiny vibe of "A Honeymoon Well Spent" from this little exchange, please don't go down that path...

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 4

I loved every moment of the series. I look forward to the next chapter!

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 4

Your writing has improved since the third chapter. Good. I myself don't find a story "dark", if the antagonists deserves the justice he/she gets. Really though, given long enough and they'll need a five bathroom mansion. Given long enough and keith will be lugging a yule log around between his legs. Powers must be given a limiting factor, otherwise they get out of hand.

Chaos Master
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 5, Technical= 4

I LOVE this story, I hope to see more of this wonderful story soon.
My PERSONAL thoughts on this chapter are as follows :

I hope the Pride soon at least thinks of the possibility of another enemy (Inutech),maybe they will at least find the bug on Keith soon . It would have made them more money in the long-term if they had KEPT the company, if nothing else the employees could have been used as bodyguards.

Overall= 4, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 4

Amazing but a bit dark.

Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 5, Technical= 5

As others have said it was darker overall. I enjoyed the TG in it and hop to see more of that. Also more detailed descriptions would be great. Still enjoyed it very much.

Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 4

I've always been fond of anime-style catgirls, and this series is like a dream come true. I'm looking forward to more chapters, and hopefully more detailed descriptions, and statistics of the three-sizes of the cat women as I'm a numbers freak.

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 4

I never like bully characters. Whether he actually deserved what happens, who's to say. Definitely a darker overall tone in this one.

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 4

Continues to be great! This one was quite a bit darker than the previous chapters, but from what I was reading near the end it sounds like it won't be the darkest chapter...

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