This is a modified version of Compera's story "Manboobs", changed to make the protagonist female. Most of the credit goes to Compera.
"Rianna visits her pregnant aunt to help her out on the farm, but soon experiences uncomfortable developments and a more sinister plot."
Average Scores:
- Overall: 4.30
- BE: 4.50
- Characters: 3.60
- Technical: 4.10
JJM
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 5
A little long and drawn out... just not fast paced enough for my liking. But that's just me, so I won't ding you for that.
I didn't like the main character much. She seemed stupid... too stupid to know what to think about what was going on, etc...
Probably could have incorporated the cows and such more in to the story...
milk man
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
Can you do the same to Manboobs II? That would be freakin amazing!
Coffee Pilot
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
Great story. Great BE. The first half definitely seemed to be a lot more thought out and detailed than the second half - got a little hard to follow towards the end. I think your descriptiveness of the growth, lactation, clothes issues, and especially how it affected her normally physically inclined self were by far my favorite aspects of the story. Definitely enjoyed the first half the most.
The scene with Mindy the neighbor was a little 'wtf?': liked the scene but it seemed to have been just dropped into the story. She shows up, goes after Rianna for no apparent reason, and is never heard from again. Would have liked more character development and motivation/interaction there instead of just the sex scene.
Not sure if it was just me but it would have been a lot easier to read if there had been better formatting. I just saw it as one giant paragraph with no breaks or tabs. Grammar and spelling seemed ok though.
Good job overall though! Would like to see more and/or a revised version of this one.
Above Ground Pool
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 3
It`s really useful! Looking through the Internet you can mostly observe watered down information, something like bla bla bla, but not here to my deep surprise. It makes me happy..!
Fob Watch
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 3, Technical= 4
I absolutely loved it! I'd like to see more.
jd
Overall= 2, BE= 3, Characters= 1, Technical= 1
I liked the original more. This felt awkward and stuttering compared to the original. It was as if you just used the 'replace' function and 2 paragraphs worth of new characterization.
Vrael
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
Freaking amazing
More please!
tim
Overall= 4, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 5
nice! we need more like this. thanks!
Milklover
Overall= 4, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
Good job on the conversion, would love to see some kind of sequel
Smartass
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 3, Technical= 5
Nice job on the conversion, was a bit skeptical at first on how you'd change the story but pleasantly surprised. Thought making the character a ballerina and thus worried about weight gain was a good choice. STILL WAITING FOR SEQUEL!
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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