Another Moment in Time, this time with a pair of long time friends who have an expanding time shopping for a dress...
Average Scores:
- Overall: 3.33
- BE: 2.83
- Characters: 2.50
- Technical: 3.00
ron
Overall= 2, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 3
Nice beginning, but too fast ongoing.
Trier
Overall= 3, BE= 3, Characters= 2, Technical= 1
Overall not too bad. However the stories flow is broken when the tense changes from past to present. This is a common problem many writers fail to notice. Try to keep the tense consistent to ensure ease of reading. Suddenly going from "She had never..." to "She then sits..." is like hitting a road block.
deus
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 3
There are quite a few typos. I enjoyed it, but it was pretty short. Keep writing, but spend a little more time proofreading or ask someone else to check it for you. Also, it wouldn't hurt if there were a little more to the story.
Winterstein
Overall= 5, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 5
Xanadu
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 3, Technical= 5
The file is fine. It's an OpenOffice document, and that program is free.
Alucard
Overall= 1, BE= 1, Characters= 1, Technical= 1
The file doesn't work. Make it a word document.
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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