Sarah is an average girl in an average world which tends to pass her by. Up until recently, she has had trouble attracting guys. But after a random act of kindness, her world is about to change (to her surprise) for the better.
My first story - I hope you enjoy it!
Average Scores:
- Overall: 4.50
- BE: 4.50
- Characters: 3.67
- Technical: 4.17
Nameless
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 5
Liked it...Liked it a lot!
Roid Abuser
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 4
Excellent story and truly unexpected.
If there is one complaint, it was that it was TOO SHORT.
BA099
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
For a first try, this is very well done. I hope to see more from you in the future.
I have nothing to 'nitpick' about save for a few grammar errors and simple mistakes.
Your style is clean and straightforward, keep it up!
Echo
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 5
Liked this story a lot. Couple of small errors but did notice you had posted a 'corrected' version - had already downloaded and read this version. Good grammar and overall a top effort for a first posting.
a al344444444455533
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 4
It was good, but needed more in depth description and larger proprtions, especially her butt and bust.
Aitchbee
Overall= 3, BE= 4, Characters= 2, Technical= 3
Two nit-picking points:
1) Why is her stride shorter when she has longer legs?
2) A 34-28-34 figure is NOT hourglass; the chest/hip measurement must be 50% more than the waist measurement.
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
Due to comment spam, any new posts with http in them will be destroyed.
