Patrick worries about the "big" problem he and Diane have gotten into. Patrick is beside himself with worry while Diane is reveling in her newfound growth.
And then Callie enters the apartment...
(Part II of Unexplained Additions)
Average Scores:
- Overall: 3.67
- BE: 3.67
- Characters: 4.00
- Technical: 4.33
Red
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 4
Great story, good to see something like this back on the site.
MrHHH
Overall= 2, BE= 2, Characters= 3, Technical= 5
Wow, you took a good story and totally screwed it up. Part of what made the original story good was the writing style, which you failed to copy.
Another thing was the girl's attitude, which became boring when you wrote her.
gman1
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
Due to comment spam, any new posts with http in them will be destroyed.