A Palimpsest of a modern fairy tale in which an evil princess gains enormous breasts through magic.
Average Scores:
- Overall: 4.29
- BE: 3.24
- Characters: 4.24
- Technical: 4.41
Nasty
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
A wonderfull tale, with wonderfull charecters. I'd like to read more of your writings.
DarkHeart
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 3, Technical= 4
At first I was a bit dubious about the fairytale style of the telling, but it was very well done. It's the first story in sometime that I enjoyed this much. The names of the various characters was quite amusing, even if a bit obvious. Please write some more.
Wow
Overall= 5, BE= 3, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
An instant classic. A bit short on the actual description of both the BE and the girls (although the great smell-description is terrific), but who cares? I had a hoot reading it.
NV
Overall= 5, BE= 2, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
Daunte
Overall= 5, BE= 2, Characters= 4, Technical= 5
Amusing to read, and the story flowed nicely, if a bit long winded occasionally. It was nice to not have to wade through a sea of spelling and gramatical errors too.
You have a real talent for descriptive writing, but at the same time you seemed a bit leery of applying it to anything physical. The characters reactions were nicely detailed, while you took a few shortcuts on appearance and BE. Maybe that was becuase you didn't want to use the same old tired out BE descriptions, I don't know...but I'm sure if you did apply some of that creative skill to the BE scenes it would be well worth it!
Hope to read more from you in the future.
good start
Overall= 3, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 3
keep working on your revisions!
basil_jelly
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
Loved it. A real fairy tale with all the trappings. Normally I would down check folks for using archaic langauge but you used it well.
D
Overall= 4, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
Frithnaker
Overall= 4, BE= 2, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
Funniest story I have read in a long time. Extra points for using the word "nard" correctly. I also espically like the not-at-all subtle names you give your characters. Keep on writing more like this one!
Owl
Overall= 5, BE= 3, Characters= 4, Technical= 5
It's not often someone writes a story of this quality, especially these days. Could have used some more description on the BE end of things, though.
Ben Collings
Overall= 3, BE= 4, Characters= 3, Technical= 5
An excellent written story, if a little long winded, a few comical names lightened the atmosphere of the story. To be honest though it was a little too "ye olde" for my liking.
Bejabbers
Overall= 4, BE= 1, Characters= 3, Technical= 2
It was a fun read, although ye olde English has got to go. I mean, what's next? Iambic pentameter? :) (I'm definitely thinking too much).
Ancient-Balance
Overall= 5, BE= 3, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
Written with great skill. Readers please note: although weak on BE there is huge nipple fantasy here of which there has been too little in the bulk of BE fiction.
MrHHH
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
The best BE fairy tale I've read.
rtpoe
Overall= 5, BE= 3, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
I especially liked that the magic spells & rituals were fully described. Very few magic/fantasy BE stories bother to do that.
A little lacking the the description of the BE, but I guess that's a matter of style.
rtpoe
Horseradish
Overall= 4, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
Well done. Very well written and phrased. Keep it up!
deux_anges
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 5, Technical= 4
Good first attempt. Hope to see more of your work
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