The Definitive BE Story Archive

The Overflowing Bra

Red Cloak
A girl gets her hands on an old red magical cloak. See what happens when her sister gets half of it. 
Average Scores:

Overall= 4, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5

Deja vu?

This is an old story.

Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 3, Technical= 3

Definitely seen before; couldn't say who the original author was. Still an interesting story.

Overall= 4, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 4

Read this one some time before, but it looks like it's had several touchups.

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5

I have posted this story on the Be Archive website before. Thought it would find some new readers here.

Overall= 3, BE= 4, Characters= 3, Technical= 3

I like it mainly because I do have a deep red dress.
Anyway the characters are OK, just need some more work, perhaps some more rivalry between the two sisters.
The ending, I felt was a bit rushed though and I feel needs a rework.
Yeah I agree with the whole feeling that I have read something like this before, try and stamp your own original ideas and concepts to a story next time.

Overall= 3, BE= 3, Characters= 2, Technical= 4

It needed flushed out a little more.

Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 4, Technical= 5

Nicely cleaned up from the previous version. An enjoyable read!

Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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Rate this story from 1-5 stars (5 stars is best) in the following categories:

Overall Enjoyment(How much did you like the story overall?)
1 2 3 4 5

BE Description (Detail, quantity, quality)
1 2 3 4 5

Characters (Descriptions, likeability)
1 2 3 4 5

Technical Quality (Writing style, grammar, etc.)
1 2 3 4 5

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