The Definitive BE Story Archive

The Overflowing Bra

The Man
Two Best Friends and a Sister
Laura and Claire find a working breast growth formula that works and grow freakishly large tits. Now Laura's sister wants in on the fun, but takes it way out of control. UPDATED FROM MY PREVIOUS VERSION.
Average Scores:

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 5

Amzingly hot story!

Big Norm
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5

I think that the breasts could end up bigger in a part 2 or have them grow height wise into giantesses with even more humungous tits. The girls could even ask the cream company for the formula and make their own batch and apply it to other friends. And maybe they could change the formula to make their clitorises grow HUGE so they could fuck each others breasts or each other, or change it to make themselves grow taller.

Overall= 1, BE= 1, Characters= 1, Technical= 1

Want to read it but am unable to, as it causes an error with wordpad, everytime I try to open it.

Overall= 4, BE= 5, Characters= 3, Technical= 4

I like this story, but for your next update you should know that penguin inc. has copyed the formula of the growth serum and wants your protagonists as guinea pigs.

Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 3

Could have gone on a little bit longer.

Overall= 3, BE= 2, Characters= 4, Technical= 4

Not enough BE.

Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5

If everyone reading this story thinks its so bad, lets see what u faggots can bring to the table. No BE, its on every page of the story, christ.

Overall= 4, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5

A good story.
Keep up the good work :)

Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 4, Technical= 4

It was a pretty good story, but seemed to end a little quickly. B+

The Toymaker
Overall= 3, BE= 5, Characters= 3, Technical= 3

The grammar got cleaned up some, that's good, and there was a bit more tacked on at the end. I think the BE is fine- it really IS on every page, just the (seemingly) random cup sizes are a little confusing... I think it would help your cause to describe the girls' breasts in relation to their size more instead of just giving double and triple letters. I liked it, it seems open-ended somewhat... (will they ever get Diane out of the bathroom? Just how big did everyone get? What did the parents think?) Next time, I say wrte a new story, don't just fix an old one. Either way, keep writing.

Overall= 3, BE= 4, Characters= 3, Technical= 3

First - Chill out and learn to take some criticism, sheesh. You had one guy who gave you a low score because he couldn't read it, so he's not criticizing your story itself... Then you got a 4, 5, and 3 overall scores, to average out to a 4. And you're popping a vein? Jeez, ever think that MAYBE it could still use a little work before it merits all fives? Plus, padding your own stats by giving yourself all 5s is unimpressive - just to let you know.

As for the story: Certain parts don't make too much sense, and as an earlier commentator mentioned, you seemed to put too much importance on letter sizes, which don't help that much beyond more 'realistic' sizes(not too many people have a true mental image of what an H-cup breast looks like, much less ones at the end of the alphabet).

That being said, you certainly offered a lot of BE. Muchos points for quantity, the detail was okay.

The characters were very feh, there's no reason WHY they want big breasts. "This is something we've wanted all our lives." Good for them - but as a reader, I'd like to know why. Maybe it's just some inexplicable desire, but that wasn't really brought up well.

As for tech, there are grammatical errors, but no spelling. I'm not a huge fan of the first-person perspective, because it didn't seem overly compelling. Some stories seem to honestly immerse a reader in the character's p.o.v. This one felt like some random guy reading off a script in monotone, but all his lines were your story.

This story isn't bad, but I think it still needs a lot of work. Just my opinion, though. I think you should keep writing, there's plenty of good about your story. These are all my bad criticisms, really. It's forgettable, but better than a lot of the works out there. Final score: B-.

Code Name
Overall= 4, BE= 2, Characters= 1, Technical= 4

I'll give you cudos for being one of the few WOW-BEs on the page. But there is nothing spechal here. Discriptions barly went beyond "tight braw" "started growing," and "xyz" size. But its a common short comming, so you are in good company. The charicters were extrodinarly sshallow and one dementionl. But you got to start some where.

Overall= 3, BE= 3, Characters= 2, Technical= 3

Potential is there and so is the quantity, but there simply isn't enough detail concerning the BE quality and characters (too one dimensional and little reason behind their motivation besides some fluff at the start). Comes off as an alright read, but it's a one-time-only story and easily forgettable. Next time please spend more a little more time on fine detail of character, since the BE quality is up to par as-is if you want to keep being a stickler.

benji dude
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 2, Technical= 2

Not a bad story, a little wordy I thought. More time needs to be taken on grammar the ammount of times I saw out instead of our, sort of spolis the whole thing. I'm all for fantasy but I can't see anyone being able to cup half a gallon of anything in their hands. Also the character had no REAL motivation for getting big tits, other than they wanted them, ask your self why they wanted big tits? Fame, fortune, revenge?

Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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Rate this story from 1-5 stars (5 stars is best) in the following categories:

Overall Enjoyment(How much did you like the story overall?)
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BE Description (Detail, quantity, quality)
1 2 3 4 5

Characters (Descriptions, likeability)
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Technical Quality (Writing style, grammar, etc.)
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