What happens when you mix a chemistry project, milk, and two teenage girls? Lots and lots of breast growth.
Average Scores:
- Overall: 2.50
- BE: 2.33
- Characters: 2.67
- Technical: 2.50
Prophet Tenebrae
Overall= 2, BE= 1, Characters= 2, Technical= 2
It's a passable first effort... the obvious stumbling blocks are some of the clunky dialogue, the growth scenes which amount to (D to E to F), the deliberate testing of something potentially dangerous for no real reason... if the girls were drunk or they knew what it might do - then perhaps it would be more credible.
I think the best thing to do is develop the characters more and let the reader be more at ease with them. Let the growth scenes be something more natural, in both occurance and nature... The old fruit and sports equipment comparisons are a lot better than cup sizes.
Anonymous
Overall= 1, BE= 2, Characters= 4, Technical= 1
I'm too lazy to leave any feedback. The most valuable thing a reader can give an author.
Anonymous
Overall= 2, BE= 2, Characters= 3, Technical= 3
Enjoyable enough, but more urgency could have been put into the BE
Anonymous
Overall= 3, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 3
I'm too lazy to leave any feedback. The most valuable thing a reader can give an author.
Mong
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 2, Technical= 3
Good first effort, looking forward to part 2!
CGMan
Overall= 3, BE= 3, Characters= 2, Technical= 3
Looking forward to the follow-up. BE was too quick IMO.
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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