The Definitive BE Story Archive

The Overflowing Bra

a-spooky-ghost
Upper Management
After being mercilessly teased by a tall, busty woman at work, Cora takes matters into her own hands to even the odds.
Average Scores:

Anonymous
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 3
I think this has potential to be more. To be honest, I think the story falls a little short for the tags, if only on technicalities. The woman in question gets tall for sure, but nothing extraordinary that can really justify the GTS tag.

In terms of technical quality, there's also the odd adjective here and there that doesn't quite fit with the rest of the sentence. For example, breasts probably won't jiggle too much if they're confined and nothing is actually making them move. Work on showing the readers, rather than telling them, if that makes sense.

Overall, it could be better, but it could also have been worse, so not a bad first submission. Keep at it.
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Rate this story from 1-5 stars (5 stars is best) in the following categories:

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BE Description (Detail, quantity, quality)
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Characters (Descriptions, likeability)
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Technical Quality (Writing style, grammar, etc.)
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