Ratings

Ok, something with some actual breast expansion. There's a subcult of erotica out there, based on mind control. A lot of it is, uh..well, never mind. Some of it, however, is not all that bad. There is a subcult of THAT subcult, called 'Master PC', where the stories are written that you can use a program to design anyone to look or act anyway you want. 

A lot of that is stranger than fiction, no telling who wants what nowadays..;) Where this all got started? well, I just thought I would give it one of those 'origin of' stories. Sci-fi, a bit too much plot, but hopefully the naughty bits will make up for that.

Run through Word spell and grammar check (word 2003). Read through a couple of times as well. With luck, it is not too off. Have fun

TacoKing

Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 3, Technical= 2

I really did enjoy this story, it was a fairly long one but I actually like that facet. The amount of BE as well as other transformation was frequent (which I liked), though greater detail could have been used. The charcters were rather simple, but they wern't annoying so I could tolerate them. Overall a great read.

Codeandrew

Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 4, Technical= 4

I thought this was a great start to a story. Although I would be curious to know if you are going to continue with your two characters or go into the past? I felt that you could of done more at the end but i figure this was a test to see how it went over. I also like how you didn't involve to much in such a short story. I have read other MC works and find some go wrong when they try to add just too much in. But I felt this one was very good. Simple/sweet very nice read.

pakled

Overall= 3, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 2

did I turn off comments on this? or is it really that bad?..;) want to improve it if I can. Scathing comments appreciated..;)

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