An enjoyable read. I felt that the writer's device of describing in succession both Gary's feelings and that of his 'victims' was successful - it certainly worked for me. I look forward to reading in due course how Gary develops his new-found power.
Good start, not bad for a first story. Occasional grammatical errors, but nothing too detracting. The BE needs more description though - rookie mistake of describing the growth through nothing but lettered cup sizes. Even sports equipment or produce is better (albeit clichéd) as it gives a better mental image. This story has potential - would enjoy seeing more, and more detailed to boot.
Tis good but it felt that it when into the BE too fast and just Knowing what to do at that time [when he ran outside] seems like the easy way .
not that im a writer or anything .
Story needs some defineit work. I can see the potential, but a good editor and some more practice would turn this into a great story.
Good Popcorn, Really. But I want the feast...:)
Like Eggman said, just having cups to describe the BE and nothing else seriously hurt the overall effect; but, the nipple part was pretty descript. I like Gary as a character, but you didn't really give him much to do aside from sculpt girls. The plotline was very disappointing. The technical quality kept snagging my attention, so I'm sorry if I was harsher in the other areas than I might have been, for sake of not catching something that I should have. Gary, as a character, has potential. Even though I've seen it before, the "artist who can sculpt women in the same way he draws" is one of my favorite BE concepts.
short and sweat, lots of room for expansion, if you'll excuse the pun. I agree with what's been said cup size's aren't great as a form of discribing how large breasts are.
You might want to slow the tempo down a bit as well, it felt like things were going at light speed.