A high school student gets a strange invitation and uses it to reconcile with his ex.
Average Scores:
- Overall: 3.83
- BE: 3.25
- Characters: 3.67
- Technical: 3.67
Jason G
Overall= 3, BE= 2, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
Overall your writing style is pretty good. The metal bits kinda threw me, but I should have known, since you have it flagged for weird. Neat premise, and shows promise. Hope you write more (though you may not since this is already over 2 yrs old).
oboy
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 5
I enjoyed it. Please continue it.
DarkHeart
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 4
Well written, but the story getting cut off wasn't too happy stuff. Hope you post the rest soon.
SomaHolidaye
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 4
Well written, awesome premise. I am interested in seeing what happens next! Write another, and another, and another...
Not Leviathan
Overall= 2, BE= 2, Characters= 2, Technical= 4
i grew bored of the story quite quickly
Seahawky
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 3
Need to post the rest. I liked it very much
Hell-scythe
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 4
Good start. Need to pick better stop points. Very interesting idea, I would like to see more. Really curious where you are going with it.
Vahktang
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 4, Technical= 3
What harm could it do?
The guy injects himself with a mysterious stuff?
Just like that?
Funny.
More later,
Vahktang
Benji Dude
Overall= 2, BE= 2, Characters= 2, Technical= 2
A few gramma/ spelling mistakes didn't help much and it was written at a very slow place even the spontanoiu sex at the end, needs some work.
DaEggMan
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 4, Technical= 3
I liked the characters and the transformation scene, tho would have liked a longer, more central one. Hope there is more to come.
SomaHolidaye
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
You said this was based off of the "Metaled Sharon" Thread on the unending BE Adventure, which episode was that? Otherwise this is awesome! Write the next part!
infomercial
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 4, Technical= 3
the last ep is 337315, just use the "chain from"
utility in the index
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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