The Definitive BE Story Archive

The Overflowing Bra

Layla Heles
Believe The Fortune-teller
A young woman called Layla and her boyfriend Danny meet a fortune-teller. What happen when Layla doesn't believe in her prophecy? Well, the fortune-teller give her a price to pay for her skepticism... on her chest. 
English is not my first language then I can understand if my story could have grammar mistakes, but try to give a chance to this story. 
Illustrated story with PDF, docx and picture.
Average Scores:

Y
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
it was a nice tease!! Thanks!
KJ
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 5, Technical= 3
I really liked the premise behind this story and  for an ESL you did great.  The sex scenes were kind of  cliche'.

I hope you keep writing
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