Some girls are bigger than others. That makes them better.
Average Scores:
- Overall: 3.75
- BE: 3.75
- Characters: 3.25
- Technical: 3.63
BB47
Overall= 2, BE= 4, Characters= 2, Technical= 2
Cute story, but zero sexual encounters and not enough character depth. However, it was nice to see young chicks with boobie greed.
Elbee
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
Ummmm...
How come no one else gave this story a FIVE across the board???
Ganja Joe...you came up with a story that was way too hot to read in one sitting! I did not want it to end...and I hope it doesn't!
You hit on the age when most of us first became cognizant of these desires and fantasies that bring us to this board and avoid the pedo element by having there thought processes clearly be those of adults, and though a kid of that age never is an adult...you indulged the fantasy...nice.
So....is there more? What about those dates ...you mentioned earlier in the atory?
BTW..I agree with all of the sugegstions and the high points mentioned above! You are nailing one aspect of the fantasy...completely!
Thank you for sharing!
anon
Overall= 3, BE= 3, Characters= 3, Technical= 3
There's the kernel of a good story here, but it needs refinement.
1. Stakes: what's the core conflict? The story as it stands is that Lilly wants big boobs, Lilly takes a bunch of things that should give her big boobs, Lilly grows huge boobs, Lilly subordinates the popular girls to her will through the power of her huge boobs without much of a fuss. There's a hint of conflict when Lanie grows bigger than her, but she just sort of rolls over and accepts it, which seems out of her (rather vaguely-sketched) character.
2. Description. Band sizes and cups in a journal: boring. Descriptions of breasts bulging out of bras and shirts, and of girls marveling at how big and full they're getting as the two of them joinly slather on cream: interesting. You even set up this scene but then never actually follow through on it. Just mentioning offhand that Lanie helps put cold cream on Lilly's boobs.
32DD
Overall= 2, BE= 1, Characters= 1, Technical= 2
cup-sizes and band measurements mentioned more than 60 times.
OAO
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 3, Technical= 3
Pretty good stuff here for the most part.
Vaelon
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 3, Technical= 4
Enjoyable, but seemed to end rather abruptly.
Buzz
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 5
A very enjoyable story! It would have been nice to have some more descriptions of the weight, as well as a few more paragraphs on how the characters were dealing with their new assets. Another similar story would be great... perhaps with younger girls getting even bigger? Underage isn't a problem as long as there's no sex.
Dojo
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
Love small breast humiliation. There isn't enough of it.
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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