This is my first real attempt at writing BE. This is the story of Mandy McKiver, your average girl until she comes to a myserious acupuncture shop.
Average Scores:
- Overall: 4.38
- BE: 4.23
- Characters: 4.23
- Technical: 4.08
Stretch
Overall= 4, BE= 3, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
It's good writing though the story seemed to end a bit abruptly. It alsost seems that you got a bit tired of writing it near the end. Still it was enjoyable!
Joe375
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
Even if it wasn't your first attempt, I'd still say well done.
IceOwl
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 3, Technical= 5
Very well written, and I think it ended exactly where it should have.
ax
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
gman
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 5
cjpos
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 5, Technical= 5
I would prefer another ending, but congratulations on a well writen story.
Breasts
Overall= 5, BE= 5, Characters= 5, Technical= 4
I really enjoyed this story. Keep up the good work. I hope to see another story like this one by you again soon. ;)
kubla.khan@hotmail.com
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 3
I absolutely loved the story...
until the ending
kind of a smart aleck sounding beginning too
but once in to it things moved nicely
ending a story with breasts growing to the size of a city block is just plain silly.
anyway
do another
if you ever want to work on one together i'd love to too.
Technowolf
Overall= 4, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 3
The character descriptions were a bit too detailed, and the ending seemed like it was rushed. Overall, a good story with great BE, but needed to be worked on a little bit more.
zippy
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
size description too rushed at the end, but overall good
MSP
Overall= 5, BE= 4, Characters= 5, Technical= 4
Anonymous_En
Overall= 4, BE= 5, Characters= 4, Technical= 4
Liked it a lot. Loved the descriptions! Make another one please!
Waldorf+Statler
Overall= 4, BE= 4, Characters= 4, Technical= 3
Amazing for first try! Keep 'em coming!
Please give the authors feedback, I can not emphasize enough how important it is to them.
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