Wooster Rewooted

Wooster Rewooted
by Plato Voltaire
Copyright 2011

1
"Ah," said the feminine voice, sounding matronly and pleasant with its Australian accent, "our little seppo is finally awake. Can you tell me your name?"
      Unable to open his eyes, the man spoke with a groggy voice. "Ryan... Wooster." He felt that he was on a bed, fidgeting to get up only to have a soft yet firm hand push him back.
      "Now, now, Mr. Wooster," said the woman. "You had a nasty bit of bother. In a few more days you'll get to put feet to floor. I'm wondering, how did you come about that last name?" She held a cup of water to his lips, and Ryan needed no further prompting to drink.
      Throat no longer parched, Ryan spoke easier. "Ellis Island. My great grandfather last name was Wuster with a 'u', but another man ahead of him in the line had the same spelling." He took another draw of water. "So they changed it Rooster, but with a 'w' instead of an 'r' at the beginning." He winced. "I can't see," Ryan said with concern. He wanted to rub his eyes but his arms were restrained. He then spoke with more urgency. "Where's Hanna?"
      "Your wife is recovering," the pleasant voice issued. "She'll be right before too long. At the doctor's discretion she'll be moved in right next to you. We had to keep your arms secured as you were thrashing them about for awhile." There was a pause as the woman checked Ryan's temperature and pulse. "You had a nasty bit of business in that ice cave, but your eyesight will return along with Hanna's." Ryan could hear the woman grin. "Now, since you're up, you should be able to drink some lollywater and keep it down."
      "How about a steak?" Ryan said with tired words.
      "No solids yet, love. We got to be sure what you put down stays down. If you chunder now you might hurt your throat."
      "Chunder?" the ill man questioned.
    "It's Aussie for throw up. I'll keep the lingo to a minimum, love."
      "Don't mind me, nurse. I've paid enough for this trip to experience some local flavor."

Over the next several days Ryan was visited by several persons, all of which said they were medical specialists. They had Ryan perform some exercises with his limbs, hands and feet, attaching what felt like plastic patches to his skin. They told him the patches were for medical monitoring equipment used for physical therapy. Among of these specialists was one that identified himself as his doctor. He asked Ryan a set of questions to test his memory, going by the report drawn up the authorities regarding the incident that placed Ryan and his wife Hanna in the hospital. In between occasional draws of cool water Ryan told the story. For their vacation the Woosters went to New Zealand with the prime focus on visiting the sites that had the exterior sets of the Lord of the Rings films. As for one of the other attractions it was visiting a glacier on the southern island. While on the glacier a sudden storm came up and they got separated from their guide. Finding an ice cave, the Woosters went inside to wait out the storm, only to have the cave entrance covered by an avalanche. Shock and cold took hold and both went unconscious from a lack of oxygen. The next thing Ryan remembered was talking to the nurse.
      In turn Ryan asked some counter questions. He learned that he was at the St. Vincent Hospital in Sydney. When asked why Sydney instead of Christchurch the doctor said that St. Vincent had the better facilities to handle Ryan and Hanna's condition. Pressed, the doctor said the couple were in a state of suspended animation for four weeks when found by chance by another tour group. As the hospital was studying intense cold as related to human metabolism the experts were on hand to revive the couple. Deemed not strong enough to manage a phone conversation, Ryan settled having to listen to messages from the family read to him by the nurses. Then he was treated to an early Christmas present. Still blind and bed bound he nevertheless felt like a million dollars when Hanna's bed was wheeled next to his, holding hands with his beloved.
      Very shortly afterward the Woosters were given physical rehabilitation. Walking was the first order of business, followed by manual dexterity and basic exercises such as push-ups, pull-ups and lifting light weights. Vision was still out, but the two did enjoy a set of slow dances, reminding them of their wedding night. "How's my honey doing?" Hanna said sweetly during a slow-step. "I wonder if you look as rugged as you sound?"
     "Then it's a good thing you can't see," Ryan purred like he had gravel in his throat for dramatic effect. "And just as well I can't see you. I can only imagine your bed hair."
      "Flattery will get you everywhere, honey. Speaking of flattery, don't you consider it strange that no-one from our families have shown up?"
      Ryan had his doubts, but hearing Hanna speak the key of all that was nagging him gave voice to his observations. "That's true, Hanna. Plus the news channels haven't made a mention of us. If we were in suspended animation for four weeks like the doctors claim then this hospital would've been mobbed by the media."
      Hanna giggled. "Perhaps they're just waiting until we've presentable. Frostbite may have done a number on that mug of yours."
      "Naw, the media loves that kinda of stuff," Ryan countered. "We'll ask the doctors together and find out what's going on."

2
It was Christmas Eve, and Ryan woke to find that his vision was partially restored. He couldn't make out faces all too well, but could tell the difference between men and women, especially in regards to the women. All of the five distinct nurses and female doctors that tended to Ryan and Hanna had notable chests, making Ryan silently praying thanks to God for the staffing of this hospital. Unlike the previous days, the doctors now sounded like they spoke from a script, only saying their questions will be answered in the afternoon by two special guests.
      Beds still side-by-side, the Woosters were treated to ham, peas, and mashed potatoes for lunch, their first solid food in hospital. They had only to wait until 2 p.m. when the guests arrived. It was a pair of women, and even with his foggy eyes Ryan witness that they were pneumatic of chest under the coats they wore. With heights and hair color similar to memories that flooded his mind right then and there, Ryan spoke immediately. "Nancy, Jordan, is that you? You two look like heaven-sent angels. Did my parents and in-laws hire you two to find us in that ice cave?"
      "Oh, we're not Nancy and Jordan," said the shorter of the two women. Her Aussie accent was like honey to Ryan's ears. "They're our ancestors. And we're flattered that you likened use to angels. In our line of work some consider us to be hell-spawn banshees. "
      "Ah, even with these healing eyes I knew there was a family resemblance," Ryan said like a winner game show contestant. "So, are Nancy and Jordan your aunts?"
      The tall, dark haired one giggled. "Not aunts, Mr. Wooster. Ancestors. As in a really long time ago."
      "You're joking." Hanna said, facing the source of the voice even though she was still blinded. "Aussies are know for their perverse sense of humor. And don't tell me your names are Bruce."
      It was the short one that laughed. "Perhaps it's only me, my friend, and a half-dozen others in the world that got that Monty Python reference. We're correct in using the term ancestors. How long did the doctors say you and Ryan were in the ice cave?"
      Hanna was less certain with her answer. "Four weeks."
      "Love," said the tall one, "you and your hubby were in that ice cave for 404 years."
       Ryan's eyes wanted to bug out of his skull. "404 years? That's Buck Rogers territory! There's no way me and Hanna could've been in suspended animation for that long."
      "That's one miracle you have to be thankful for, Mr. Wooster," said the short woman. She got up close to Ryan's face, no more than a handspan away. From here Ryan saw it wasn't Nancy, but a youthful woman with green eyes and platinum blond hair. "Even with the exact conditions required to preserve your lives there was a lot of work for the doctors and nanites. It'll be some time before you'll have the courage and curiosity to look at your pre-op photos."
      Hanna's grip on Ryan's hand tighten. "How were we found? I mean, watching a glacier is like watching paint dry."
      "Ah," said the dark haired one, "You two were found in a stasis box by the authorities at the Nancy-Bird Walton Spaceport with the label 'extremely perishable' applied to it."
      "Spaceport? You're saying that this isn't Earth?" Hanna started.
      "And this isn't actually Sydney?" Ryan finished. "That would explain why the doctors didn't even correct me when I mentioned the name of Sydney's soccer and rugby teams and their Melbourne counterparts."
      The short one held Ryan's free hand. "You two are actually in St. Vincent Hospital, but in the city of New Darwin, capital of the Commonwealth planet of Outback. The authorities didn't find you on the glacier. Someone else did, and in turn saw it that you two were in that stasis box."
      "Who would do that?" Hanna was more intrigued than distressed at this point. The fact that she was on another planet didn't register at the moment. "Would we been kept in stasis and become part of someone's collection?"
      The tall one placed a supportive hand on Hanna's shoulder. "If he wanted to, but didn't. He's up to something, making sure you two were noticed at the spaceport and taken to hospital."
      Ryan was puzzled. "Why go through the trouble, then, just to let us go?"
      The blond smile. "That's why we're here, Mr. Wooster. Having encountered him several times we're the closest thing to experts on the man that found you."
      "Since you're going to do all that, can you give us your names, ladies?"
      "I'm Sergeant-Detective Lynnae Wilcox," said the platinum blond. "My partner is Sergeant-Detective June Parlor. As for the man we believe engineered your recovery it's someone you and my ancestor knew."
      "Don't keep me in suspense, Detective. After 400 years I'm entitled to some answers. My thawed-out brain isn't ready to play guessing games."
      Lynnae smiled. "Let it not be said I didn't give you a big enough hint. It's none other than Mr. Big."

********

The short man sneezed loudly, and his assistant was just as surprized at the suddenness of it. With tissue in hand, the man wiped his nose and tossed the result into a trash bin. "Felt like someone stepped on my grave," mused one Mr. Big, supercriminal without peer. "Or it could be allergies."
      "Or it could be the rain," said Albert, Mr.Big's assistant. Both men were on a sidewalk in the southeast part of central New Darwin. Both wore heavy coats and bowler hats that would've been right at home on the ancient streets of London. "The last thing you need is a cold to interfere with the party we've planned."
      "Yes, that would be a nuisance." Big looked up and spied the store sign he was looking for. "Ah, we're here." The storefronts facades they passed may have been new, but the interiors were more often than not preserved in their original layout. Such is the case for Unique Antiques. An old fashion bell, and not an electronic tone, sounded as Big and Albert entered the store, wiping their feet on the entry mat. In carefully maintained display cabinets and cases dating back 300 years were items equally as old if not older. Big went to one item that was in a main floor display, a Sony top-loading VHS cassette player/recorder. He played his hand on the case's lid, ready to open it so as to touch the machine directly.
      "Don't do that," commanded a male voice. From behind the counter the owner of the voice appeared, one Tomas Brownstone. "It's the only working example between here and Earth. Plus you'll trigger the alarm... Oh," he said with a timber of caution, "it's you."
      Big gave the taller man a harsh look. "Damn right it's me, Tomas. You got that player from me as a down payment for your service, along with genuine ancient VHS porn titles in their original boxes and wrapping." He opened the lid to the case in full knowledge the alarms were off thanks to several electronic gizmos he had on his person. He pushed a well-worn button on the player's top, opening the top-loading cassette receiver. "Is it ready?"
      "Ah, about that, Sir," said a now downright nervous Tomas. "Bear in mind you gave me an electronic device that was frozen for over 400 years. I'm still in the process of demoisturizing and cleaning it. It will take some time."
      Big's face contorted like he'd bitten into a crabapple. "Time? You've had time and a half, sonny-boy! You had a full month to work your technomagic, and you performed miracles on even older devices and in far less time. I bet you've spent more time reading that rare collection of Great Snow comics." Big's grin was perfect for a corpse in the grips of rigor, spying a dog-eared copy of the aforementioned comic on the counter. The very same comic Tomas moved out of view with great haste. "Great Snow? What rubbish! Another pretentious, day in the life tale of low-enders working in a discount department store. My farts are better stories than those conceited tales!"
      "If I rush, I might ruin it." Tomas countered strongly. "The data drive may fail if wrongly treated."
      "Looks like I'll have to motivate you." A snap of Big's fingers made Albert fetch something from one of his large, deep coat pockets. What came up was Big's pet miniature dachshund Pumpkin. The rotund little bitch looked happily about the shop, excited by the smells of old wood, plastic, and polished metalworks. Albert handed the doxie to Big, and in turn was placed in the display case. With head between hands about to crush his skull in agony Tomas watched as the reddish-brown coated dog relieved itself on the Sony like a champion race horse. Smiling, Big picked up his precious pet and hugged it, letting it lick his chin.
      "That... that was a priceless antique!" Tomas managed to say.
      "And now it's garbage," Big proclaimed like a king. "You can keep the VHS tapes. They'll fetch a nice price all by themselves." Being who he is, Big's eye traveled down the counter to land on Unique Antiques' three other employees. There was Carolyn, a brunette with a bit of a belly but otherwise endowed with an equally-fat provided bosom. Ninon, the tall, thin blond with hardly any breasts to her name look appealing nonetheless. For the third her name was Jolie, her face and skin suggesting a mixture of Hindu and Jamaican ancestry, hair a very dark blue. Big licked his lips, his eyes mesmerizing the trio. "Tomas, your girls will enjoy the pleasure of my company until such time you're ready."
      Carolyn harrumphed. "We're his employees, not girls. There's no way we're going with a raisin-dried midget..." she stopped, a feminine gasp escaping from her lips. Tomas looked on with disbelief as all three women wore doey-eyed expressions of infatuation, faces blushing and eyelashes batting. He swore he heard some sort of music; alluring, enticing, sensual music that promised great acts of affection. As for Big he moved his outstretched hand like he was opening a sliding cabinet door, and then snapped his fingers. It was classical Big mind-control, and Tomas saw the master in action.
      "Girls, get your coats! You're going to spend Christmas Eve at my place tonight, and I have presents!" A chorus of giggles and purrs filled the air as the women went to the back room. Big sauntered up to the counter, and motioned Tomas to stoop lower. Having done so, the antique dealer felt his chin being squeezed and tugged by Big's thumb and forefinger. "You listen up, you Great Snow-reading slacker technowiz wannabe! You get me the contents of that drive by New Year's Eve, or so help me you'll be craving for a bullet in your head on the twelfth stroke of the clock!" He released Tomas' chin after making it nod up and down twice, the skin red and sore from Big's grip.
     The girl trio emerged and surrounded Big. Handing Pumpkin to Ninon, the little supercriminal wrapped an arm each around Carolyn and Jolie and walked out. Albert brought up the rear, waving an admonishing finger at Tomas. "You're free to call the Police, Mr. Brownstone. However I will be compelled to tell them, anonymously, of course, of those items in your possession that were obtained via illegal means. Those Zobe HD 180 PMDs, for example, came from the Historical Consumer Electronics Museum on Jadestone fifty years ago. So, be a good man and do the job Mr. Big payed you for, and everything will turn out fine."
      It was a testament to his paralysis-induced panic that Tomas heard not only his rapid heartbeat, but also Mr. Big's muffled sneeze outside in the rain-pelted street.

3
Twenty minutes of eager questioning on the Wooster's part lead to a short breather. After some lemonade it resumed. "Well, I'm glad there's still money in the 25th Century, and that people still speak English... after a fashion." Ryan's hazy eyes could make out the grin on Lynnae's face. "I can forgive all that necessary deception for the last few weeks, but for this Mr. Big character, you got to be joking," Ryan stated flatly. "Either he got frozen and thawed from some cryogenic lab or that he's..."
      "Immortal," June interrupted. "Regretfully that's true, Ryan. Big has either done or participated in some of history's most notorious criminal acts for over 800 years."
      Lynnae pulled her chair closer to Ryan, motioning to June to do the same for Hanna. "At times he may act silly and engage in Rube Goldbergian schemes, but Big doesn't do things in half measures. He wouldn't have gone through the trouble of digging you two out only to have you discovered by the authorities. You may know or have something he wants."
      Ryan raised his hands in supplication. "I only know how to draw well-endowed women, and I don't have anything to my name aside from my cold weather gear. Assuming I still have it, or else Big took them for some underground auction for ancient artifacts."
      "No need to worry about that," Lyn assured. "You still had your clothes on when found. Your backpacks were accounted for as well."
      "Thank God for small favors," Hanna said thankfully, her sightless eyes on Ryan. "Hey, now that we're back from the dead, literally, does this mean Ryan's previous artwork's are now no longer as valuable?"
      June stroked her chin in a contemplative gesture. "There's some truth to that, for Ryan can always make new drawings..."
      "Like I would draw for that horny old man again," Ryan snorted. He then snapped his fingers. "Hey, where's my Z-Tab? Before passing out from the cold I had it between me and Hanna. Ever since I got it for Christmas in 2010 it never left my side."
      Exchanging glances, both Lyn and June gave their attention to Ryan. "Not to sound maudlin," said the platinum blond, "but Big very likely robbed you of your Z-Tab. Such an ancient electronic device, especially yours, can fetch millions in private auctions. That he saw to your discovery by the authorities may be nothing more than an insurance policy."
      A rising tremble of disgust marked Hanna's reaction. "You mean we were nothing more than an objective of a graverobbing old bastard? That we're only alive in case your fancy 25th Century technology couldn't figure out Ryan's Z-Tab password?"
      June gave Hanna a firm squeeze on the shoulder. "That's an acute observation. As much as I hate to admit it, it's all well and good that Big that found you. Any other treasure hunter would've only taken the the Z-Tab and left you and Ryan to your fate."
      "Some fate," said a despondent Ryan. "We're going to be the 'flavor of the week' once the media finds out. There's bound to be some freaks out there that want to go hot and heavy with someone from the 21st Century." He looked Lynnae in the eye as much as his cloudy vision would allow. "This Commonwealth government of yours will have to provide 24-7 protection, and our privacy will be non-existent. Our families are long gone, and the only connection to the past we have now are Nancy and Jordan's descendants."
      "And what wonderful descendants," chimed Lyn, patting Ryan's knee. "Regardless of that little weasel, what happened to you and Hanna is no less a miracle. It's Christmas, and you two should rejoice. The last thing you should be doing is feeling sorry for yourselves. Watching the broadcast of Midnight Mass will cheer you up, especially in the comfort of a king-sized bed in a private room in the outpatient ward."
      "Private room? That's sounds promising," said Ryan with a grin. He was rewarded with a pinch to the shoulder from Hanna.
      "Just don't rush things, hubby," cooed the wife. "I don't think all of your parts have finished thawing out yet."

********

It was five minutes into Outback's abbreviated hour called Compensate. In both a legal and culturally accepted sense it was treated as midnight. That was good enough for Big and the three female guests he was entertaining in his Victoria Tower suite. All were in the heated pool, Big flanked by Carolyn and Ninon. For Jolie she snuggled up to Albert, having already gotten her 'Big Time' earlier in the evening during a game of Twister. Pumpkin the Doxie was still in the living room, gnawing a jackalope jerky chew stick. Nothing was going to get her away from that treat until she was good and ready.
      Instead of waiting ten more minutes for 1 a.m. the group kicked off the new day with the opening of gifts. For the girls they each got a six-pack of bottled beer. They playfully pouted for they expected something else, but cheered up like proverbial Christmas lights when they saw what brand of beer it was. "Oh, frankies! It's Big Brew! I thought all of these were confiscated by the Fuzz!" Carolyn exclaimed.
      Ninon held one bottle up like it was an ancient golden idol, admiring it in the light. "Oh, I so wanted two or three of these back in the day! Thanks!" With that she removed the cap and chugged the contents, just like she did recently in college.
      "Drink deep, my lovely," Big crowed, resting his hands on Carolyn and Ninon's thighs. Eyes fixed on the thin blond's chest, Big got his Christmas present right then and there as Ninon's baby-fat chest bumps became glommable C-cups.
      "Wow! So it is true!" Jolie exclaimed, eagerly taking the bottle Albert opened for her. "I could do with some extra sweater stuffing!" She downed the 24oz contents in one draw willingly, having no need of the beer's compelling and compulsive quality to do so. Her D-cup delights swelled into fabulous fun-sized F-cups.
      Already a natural G, Carolyn couldn't stand by and let her friends have all the fun. She opened two bottles, and thanks to the frictionless interiors, was able to drink them down to the last drop. Her woman-lungs got up to a mighty mass that only an L-cup bra could hope to contain. The antique store employee handled her enlarged breasts like delicate ancient treasures, giddy with happiness. "No-one will look at my belly now that I have these babies covering it!"
      With schoolboy enthusiasm, Big rubbed Carolyn's belly like he was slathering sunscreen on a whale, not that he would ever tell his companion that particular thought, ears treated to girlish coos and giggles. With his face the master criminal gave Ninon some time-honored 'motorboating' for her breasts, made possible for the first time thanks to the boob-enlarging Big Brew beer. Jolie would've gone over to Big to get some tenderness, but Albert kept her on his side of the pool by playing his fingers over one of her nipples. The blush on both the girl's face and chest proved that Albert was a player in his own fashion, his subtlety in direct contrast to Big's overt pleasure-inducing manner.
      "Now, now, girls," Big said after a few moments, "I'll ask you to hold off drinking the rest of the beer until later today." He waited as the girls pouted like princesses denied their ponies. "We have Christmas specials to watch, and there are some very expensive designer blouses that need some serious 'breaking-in.' That can only be done while wearing them and having some Big Brew at the same time."
       "Okay," Carolyn said, the senior of the three girls. "Just wake me up in time for the parade. It's a Christmas tradition for me."
      "Same with me, Sweetie. After all, I did pay for the deluxe grandstand box a full two years in advance, and it would be a shame to waste it."

4
Save for the 3D projector the outpatient hospital room Ryan and Hanna were moved into could've been mistaken for an upscale hotel suite. With fully restored eyesight Ryan started to describe the Midnight Mass for Hanna's benefit, but she silenced him, and instead made a mental picture from what she heard from the speakers. Listening to the sermon did much to salve their still-lingering apprehension of being in a familiar yet brand new setting. After a bought of friskiness the couple slumbered rather peacefully that night, waking up Christmas morning to continue their antics in the shower. Dressed in comfortable hospital pajamas and robes the couple was then treated to breakfast served by their doctors dressed in traditional Christmas costumes.
      Lynnae and June arrived shortly afterward, along with another officer - Sergeant-Detective Paul Jarvis. Ryan felt that he was looking at a young incarnation of Lance Henriksen. Clean shaven and handsome after a fashion, Paul had heavy lines on his face that were better suited on someone twice his age. It was the way Lyn placed her hand on Paul's shoulder that made the observant Ryan suspect that they were more than just police partners. As for the gifts Paul had a box of Outback chocolate. Lyn and June each brought a nightshirt and beer stein, emblazoned with the Drake University Bulldog logo, and told the story on how they acquired such gifts.
      "That's some tale, a journey through time and space but in a police car and not a phone box," Ryan said with the incredulousness he felt when told that he was in suspended animation for 404 years. "It's like a SyFy Movie of the Week if it was adult orientated in nature. 1997 Des Moines, Iowa does sound like an exotic location for people in the 25th Century."
      "If you have any doubts," June chimed, "you can ask Mr. Big himself. Of course, he'll neglect to mention the part were he was smothered by..."
      "...righteous law enforcement," Lyn finished, moving a hand over June's rich mouth.
      That both Lyn and June were quite pleasing to the eye made Ryan feel relaxed, but what he saw next engendered lust. A woman entered the room, taller than June and skin a sensual shade of brown. Her hair was dark red, complemented by a pair of deep ocean blue eyes. She had a body that put the curves to her suit, and her chest was as prominent and pneumatic as June's, but scaled up to her frame. Ryan knew he was staring, and he had a hard time hearing over his beating heart.
      Lyn placed a hand on the tall beauty's arm. "This is Sergeant-Detective Nadia Junker, a very good friend of mine as well as June."
     Convinced he was looking at an Aussie version of Tyra Banks made bigger in the right places for all the good reasons, Ryan managed to say hello past clumsy lips. Hanna pinched his ear. "You'll have to excuse him," she said playfully, "he's not able to function well in the presence of so much beauty."
       "Why did you do that?" Ryan touched his ear in reflex.
      "Honey, I can't see but I can very well hear you. The last time I heard heartbeats and breathing like that was when I caught you watching an episode of Bikini Destinations."
      "Guilty as charged," Ryan admitted, red faced, treated to some feminine giggles.
      "Just where were you, Nadia?" June asked. "You weren't answering our 'ware queries yesterday."
      The tall exotic woman blushed. "Well, I was going to meet you two, but I got off on the wrong floor and Smudge got free, making a beeline for the children's ward. It wasn't an option to leave, not with so many ankle biters wanting to see that rascal."
      "I'm here," said a strong masculine voice. The owner of that voice walked in, dressed smartly like upper management. He had the devilish goods looks that made women give lingering gazes long after he moved out of view. He was just as tall as Nadia, every bit as virile as she was fertile. Ryan knew Hanna would be outright gawking with mouth agape, especially with that Aussie accent filling her ears. In his arms was a black-and-tan miniature dachshund. "I managed to pry this rat away from the little girl he kept watch last night against Christmas hobgoblins."
      Nadia put her arm around the man, hand resting on his shoulder. "This is Harold Walkins, Commonwealth Marshal and my hubby."
      Ryan only nodded, for his eye was on the dog in Harold's arms. He felt a bitter pang of loss, being reminded of his pet basset hound Baxter, forever consigned 400 years in the past. Seeing the little dog's happy, playful demeanor made him miss Baxter's sloppy licks to the face all the more. As if reading his mind Smudge squirmed to get out of Harold's hold, the tall man obliging by handing (more like dropping) the eager dog in Ryan' lap. After planting a few licks on the young man's chin the rambunctious canine turned his attention to Hanna. Tail wagging, Smudge planted his front paws on the blind woman's robe-covered breasts like a pair of resolute mountain climbers and, at full stretch, proceeded to greedily lick Hanna's face.
      "It has to be the bacon," Hanna said past a giggle. "If I didn't know any better I would say it was you, Ryan, had we been alone."
      Ryan noted the firm handshakes given by Nadia and Harold, his own hold still unsure. "It's a pleasure to meet both of you. Four detectives and a marshal. Do we rate that much attention because of Mr. Big?"
      "One can never underestimate Mr. Big," stated Lynnae. "That Z-Tab must have something in its memory that Big considers important, otherwise it's nothing but an exotic knick-knack dust collector. We have our techno-wizards searching the Ether, what you would call cyber-space back in the day, Ryan, for signs of activity related to it. However, Mr. Big does thing very old school, so whoever is working on the Z-Tab would have their own secured technical library. So we're being dropping in on those who specialize repairing antique electronics and ancient software."
      "I don't know whether that's a good or bad thing," admitted Ryan. "I just know it'll come back to me in the end."

********

The New Darwin Christmas Day Parade was in full swing. The floats may have looked traditional, but they glided on counter-gravity cushions instead of wheels. Huge balloons in the shapes of animals and cartoon characters were now automated airships that no longer required 'balloon wranglers' like in centuries past. Marching bands still played, and from the comfort of his grandstand box one Mr. Big watched, accompanied by his three new girls and Albert, as those bands pass by one by one.
     "Girls," the short man said, his plastiskin mask concealing his actual age as well as appearance. He wore it out of necessity as his normal face was recognizable by a significant number of New Darwin's population. "how do you like the parade?"
     Dress in sinfully rich, voluminous black bushbear fur coats that went halfway down their shins the girls giggled. "I hadn't this much fun since I was a child," admitted Carolyn. "My family had never been able to reach the center of the parade route where these grandstands are situated. The view is wizard!"
     "Plus it's warm in here," purred Ninon, snuggling up to Big. "My nose gets blarny standing out in the cold."
     Jolie wolfed down a pair of Bass Sea sardines, licking her fingers to get the last of the oil that the sardines were packed in. "What tucker you have, Biggy! These sardines are more expensive than Bottom Bass caviar!"
    "By all means take your fill! There more, including kabobs with steak and grilled jackalope meat!" Big sat back as the girls got up from their plush stadium seats and availed themselves of the bounty of the buffet table. He didn't care if their coats got messy for it was as easy to clean them as to buy new ones. All he cared was that later today his 'titsome trio' will imbibe more Big Brew beer, making their marvelous mammaries all the more massive.
   A new section of balloons passed the grandstand with one getting Big's attention. It was a depiction of Dr. Seuss' Grinch, and there were some artistic liberties taken so that the stealer of Christmas bore more resemblance to Big's own mug than to Seuss' artistic rendition. Smiling nonetheless, Big activated his minicomp and sent a message to the editorial board of the New Darwin Sun. Unless they relished being exposed for a sundry of offensives that would land them in jail, the board will put out a special edition of their electronic newspaper this afternoon. It was his gift to New Darwin, and he hoped they were going to like it. By that time Big expected to pleasure and be pleasured in turn by his three ever more buxom women.

********

The Woosters, now clad in casual clothes, gifts of Nadia and Harold, were sitting in the hospital's atrium with Lynnae and Paul attending. Smudge was there as well, curled up on Hanna' lap and sleeping after an extended bout of catch he played with Ryan. The other detectives had gone home for Christmas dinners with their families, and thus weren't present when Hanna discovered her sight was coming back. She could only make out the difference between light and dark and the most vague of blobs, but the doctors were confident her vision will continue to improve. "I owe it to this little guy," Hanna said in joyous spirit, scratching Smudge's chin that made the little dog make his own version of a purr. "I felt something click when he licked my eyes during his kissing spree. He's something special, isn't he?"
      "Not so loud," chided Paul. "Smudge is smarter than the average dog, and he's glutton for attention." Everyone laughed when Smudge, eyes still closed, made a subdued woof, tail wagging. "Mr. Big may not respect law enforcement, but he's scared of Nadia's little terror. He'll think twice of doing anything while Smudge is with you."
      "Which is going to be as long as we can make it," said a smiling Lyn. "Our superiors had a talk with the doctors. If Hanna's eyesight has improved enough by tomorrow afternoon both of you can leave the hospital."
      Ryan grinned. "Will we be spirited to a posh hotel or taken out of the city to some remote forest retreat? Can't we at least see some 'future stuff' before the media chases us around?"
      "You won't have to worry about that," asserted Paul. "The media won't know until after New Years. As far as anyone knows you two are vacationing locals recovering from frostbite. You'll get to visit New Darwin's attractions in relative privacy."
      "Relative is the word," said a newcomer. Ryan saw the source of those words. A man entered the atrium, a package under his arm and dressed in a suit and shirt with the top button undone and no tie. As Paul was dressed in the same way Ryan correctly guessed that it was, at the very least, a New Darwin men's fashion. He also looked like an IT professional Ryan knew back on Earth. Except in this case the man had better looks than the typical pasty-faced cube troll. "There's always old-fashion eyeballs and the willingness to say outside in the cold to catch a glimpse through the window."
      Lyn shook the newcomer's hand and introduced him. "This is Sergeant-Specialist Tobias Eddings. He's a genius with electronics and will cover our tracks in regards to snooping paparazzi."
      Hand outstretched, Tobias went to Ryan and Hanna. "This is so wizard," he said as he shook their hands like they were royalty. "Being able to meet such a historical artist like Ryan Wooster in person."
      That raised Ryan's brow. "Historical? How so?"
      "Ah, for at least some artists you are an inspiration, even in the 25th Century, for the way you drew, ah, sheilas," said the blushing officer. "As I assisted the hospital staff to maintain your electronic privacy I did some research on you." He handed Ryan the package. "Now it's my turn to play Father Christmas."
      With a pile of packing paper in his lap Ryan now looked like a child that had the gift he wanted. "This.. this is a Z-Tab! This must've cost a lot to get, being a relic and all."
      "It's no relic, Mr. Wooster. I had that custom built. On the outside it's a perfect copy of a Zobe Z-Tablet, but on the inside it has current electronics. In fact, most of the innards is solid plastic, but it has astronomical computing and processing power in comparison to the original. I even customized the user interface so that it resembles the one you're use to."
      "I bet you really had to do some heavy-duty research on 'ancient tech' Mr. Eddings," Ryan said, paying equal attention to both the gift and gift-giver.
      "Call me Toby, and there's some more good news. While your original Z-Tab is still unaccounted for, you still had that memory card your kept in that locket around your neck. I must admit, that acrchaic graphic format known as a 'jay-peg' is comparable to hieroglyphics. So I gave it to a friend to decrypt it."
      "Oh?" Ryan sounded despondent. "Well, I guess it's not inconceivable that even a universal format that was used for everything would someday be practically forgotten."
      "Don't sweat it, Sir. If it's irony you're after, we still employ Morse code." Seeing Ryan's perplexed face was reward enough. A prideful Toby snapped his fingers. "Yes, and we have what you call 'public wi-fi'. Go ahead, turn it on and check out the New Darwin Sun. I marked it on your browser. There's some nice video of the parade earlier today."
      The Outback natives looked on with curiosity and bemusement as Ryan explored the replica of his beloved Z-Tab. Fingers and thumbs moved on their own accord, showing how much Ryan used the device all those centuries past. He brought up the browser, finding everything in place, and went to the link Toby made. The video of the parade was rich and remained so when Ryan tried the 3D function. It was like a holding a dream, only disturbed when a notification of a breaking story floated above the photonically-produced parade. "Um, how do I...,"
      "Just touch it," Toby said. With that everyone save Hanna watched as the hologram changed and a voice, accompanied by scrolling text, spoke aloud. Entitled 'Miracle on Ice', the story went into detail about the Woosters and how they were found in a New Zealand ice cave during an archeological expedition. That they were brought to Outback was explained in that no Earth research hospital had the St. Vincent Hospital staff experience in regards to reanimating frozen tissue. Ryan was thankful that Hanna couldn't see the photos depicting their appearance as found in the ice cave, and he hoped she would see them in private and out of the public eye. Listening further, it was the perceived callousness of the announcer, especially in regards to being 'lost to their families' quip that made Hanna cry, being comforted by Ryan and an anxious Smudge. For the others they felt rising righteous heat as only one person could have released this story to the press.
      "Leave it up to that prune-faced mummy to be a Grinch," seethed Lynnae. She caught the line crediting the photos to one Fleet Scribbler, one of Big's aliases. "If his heart ever grew three times its size his chest would explode."

5
Had it been a regular working day the media would've descended on St. Vincent Hospital like raindrops. However, Big's decision to leak the story didn't take into account that media reporting assets would be on vacation, and that gave Lyn and her friends some time. Conferring briefly with her superior, Captain Patricia Laramie, Lyn had Ryan and Hanna moved out of the hospital and taken to her grandmother Felicity's apartment. At the same time Toby and his team back at Central implemented a series of false data drops into the public and private information streams, designed to confuse and slow down any tech-savvy reporter. It was going to take old-fashion reporting skills and the will to endure the cold rains of a typical New Darwin winter to catch a glimpse of the Woosters.
      Felicity was a gracious host, more than happy to help her granddaughter and have more guests for Christmas dinner. She made available the spare bedroom, which use to be Lynnae's, and a host of sweaters from her collection. Smudge, always knowing where the power rested, tried to ingratiate himself to Felicity by using his doxie eyes on her, but Felly wasn't easily taken. She had him wait in the living room while the dinner was held, only afterward treating him to turkey and ham fat lacing his dog food bowl. "You're just lucky that I still had some of that chow left," said Felly as she watched Smudge absolutely wolf down the food like it was about to be taken away. "It's been a year since I dog-sat you for Nadia, and I was going to throw it out in January." Only a hurried snort came from Smudge in response, his greedy hunger still in charge.
      "You have a very nice place, Ms. Wilcox," said Ryan as he guided Hanna to the living room, taking the sofa offered by the senior woman. "I hope we won't cause too much of a bother if the press finds us here."
      "Don't worry that handsome head of yours, Ryan," Felly said in a soothing manner only grandmothers can say. "I could do with a little excitement in my ninth decade." She gave an exaggerated reproachful glance at Lyn and Paul. "Now, if only a certain couple I know would simply admit the obvious..I want to experience the joy of great-grand ankle bitters running around on my floors."
       "There you go, grandma," said a blindsided Lyn. "Embarrassing us in front of guests, and 400 year old ones at that. How childish."
      "Technically speaking, we're all children compared to the Woosters," snickered Felly. She turned to the young couple on the couch. "Hanna, I daresay you got married to your beau before you were thirty."
      Hanna blushed, holding Ryan's hand. "26, actually. Depending on your point of view, we've been married for 2 years or 406."
      "You looked particularly well-preserved for being 432 years old. Oh," Felly said, catching herself. "I'm sorry. I said that without thinking. I saw that news exclusive from the New Darwin Sun..."
      "No offense taken," Ryan said in a relax manner. "If I may be so bold, you look captivating for one in their nineties. You look like you're fifty."
      "You can thank the prolong treatments." Felly put her arm on Lyn's shoulder. "As for this little nipper she looks like a high school senior applying for a job instead of being a 41-year-old veteran cop."
      Knowing Felly, well-meaning and prideful about her granddaughter, would likely breakout the pictures and tell more stories Lyn quickly changed the subject. "Hanna and Ryan, you two had the priceless treasure of meeting my ancestor Nancy. Can you tell your story for Felicity and Paul?"
      "I'll be delighted," said the hazel-eyed Hanna, vision now able to vaguely distinguish between the light-haired Lyn and Felly and the dark-haired Paul. "It was a bleak March day in 2010, in Omaha..."

********

"...steaks!" Carolyn exclaimed as Albert each girl in turn. "This must've cost you a year of baggies!"
      "Expensive, but it's all worth it," Big chortled, looking royal at the head of the table. The Christmas dinner was going along swimmingly. "I'll have to bend the ears of the Outback Agriculture and Produce Administration to lower the tariff on imported steaks." He watched as the three girls delvd into their tucker with much gusto. Albert had cooked the steaks with his usual culinary skill, and only dessert would surpass the ecstasy the girls' taste buds were experiencing now.
      After savoring a portion of steak Ninon was making a decision on what to spear with her fork next. "Biggy, you gave us such nice gifts today, how can we thank you? We don't have anything to give you."
      The short master criminal snapped his fingers. "Ah, but you three can give me something. Albert, serve the beer."
      "Wondies! I've completely forgotten about that beer!" Jolie said with such enthusiasm that her breasts gave her snug New Darwin Thunderbolts tee-shirt a run for its money. She took the opened can of Big Brew from Albert and chugged it down, face a warm shade of red as the tee became tight as her fabulous fun-cups turned into huggable honey melons in the space of a few excited breaths.
      Ninon, decked out in a Fat Panda tee, drank slower so as to savor the beer's taste. Though still a bit loose, that tee gave proof of expansion, the cartoon panda's face being slightly stretched as Ninon's capable c-cups became exquisite endowments in less than a minute.
      Torn between the steak and the beer, Carolyn settled on having a bite of the former chased by a swig of the latter. It took longer, but her luscious love lungs increased the stress of her Barnes Brew Crew tee as they grew to naughty norks.
      Big's pleasant mammary show was interrupted by the garish ringing of an ancient phone. Albert brought the annoying appliance on a silver tray, Big lifting the receiver from the cradle and placed it to the side of his head. "Ah, Tomas," Big said happily, "you best have good news, unless you really crave the bullet... Oh, it's ready? Talk about Christmas miracles... Files recovered too? Hot damn! Fine, I'll pick it up tomorrow at your shop. G'day." He smiled as he handed the ancient device to Albert. "Well, I guess I know what Tomas did all night and all day. He has the Z-Tab working."
     "Oh, can we come with you to the shop?" Carolyn cooed as she moved to Big's side and pressed her bust into his left arm.
      "I want to see Tomas' face when he looks at us," Jolie said, taking station on Big's right and similarly massaging the associated arm with her motherly melons. "Especially those bushbear coats we'll be wearing."
      Ninon took the last available space, which was the top of Big's head, with which to rest her ladybumps. "Pretty please? Perhaps he'll give us raises after taking a gander at our chests."
     Being treated so pleasantly by the trio, without prompting, Big felt magnanimous. He took in Carolyn's delighted look like he was a thirst-beset man finding an oasis in the desert. ""Okay, I agree, but all of you have to finish the remaining Big Brew beers tonight." His his ears were treated to a brace of feminine giggles. "We'll play 'Mister Measuring Tape' after each can."
      Carolyn kissed Big on the forehead and then planted his face into her tee-covered cleavage. "Oh Biggy, you're the best!"

********

Hanna didn't want to wake up, finding the king-sized bed she and Ryan slept on simply wonderful, like it was a cloud that conformed to one's body. A sensation of weight on her chest finally made her rise to consciousness, and to her joy she found her sight fully recovered. The first thing in her field of vision was Smudge, tail wagging as he plodded up to her face and proceeded to lick it like ice cream. Felly had placed an old blanket at the foot of the bed for Smudge to sleep on for the night as the little dog plainly made clear he wanted to stay with the couple. Once done with Hanna it was Ryan's turn to get Smudge's attention, though it came as a cold nose into the ear. Clearly this was how Nadia and Harold were awaken by their most affectionate pet, and following routine Smudge went to the bedroom door and pawed at it to show he wanted to go outside to do his 'business.'
      After breakfast the Woosters were picked up by Lynnae and Paul. They were taken on a tour of New Darwin with stops at historical landmarks and institutions. Ryan had seen some of the city yesterday on the way to Felly's place, still fascinated by the sights just as Hanna was discovering for the first time. The exteriors of houses, apartments, and businesses had just enough of 'sci-fi flash' to be distinctive from 21st Century architecture. Both asked about the roads and streets, wondering if the city had traffic congestion problems or if heavy use of public transportation was made. Lyn replied that both subway and light grav-rail provided the citizens of New Darwin the majority of their transportation needs. However there was always the need for vehicles, not to mention trucks to move bulk cargoes, for civilian and government services. Outback natives, just like their American and Australian ancestors, valued their independence and found expression for it in their cars.
      For the Woosters it was the sight of Victoria Tower that finally convinced them that they were in the future. Located in east central New Darwin, the 500 story tower rose from a thick base to form a winding cone that was a tad over 2000 meters tall. Despite its size it took only six years to build, and in the process became the iconic signature of the city for the last 33 years. As much as they wanted to visit the tower then and there the couple was informed by Paul that it would take the better part of two days for a comprehensive tour, for today it was the city's premier museum. Called the Canberra Colonial Heritage Museum it wasn't so much a building but the hull of a 250,000 ton transport, the first colony ship to make a landing (albeit one-way) on Outback. Within its converted interior the Woosters saw the history of the Outback colony in holographic displays, exhibits, and theater presentations.
      As it was right after Christmas attendance was light, and that suited the couple just fine. Heading for the display that held one of Canberra's engines Ryan came to an unexpected halt. He grasped Hanna's hand tightly. "Honey, I can't see."
      "We should take him to hospital," Hanna said, her free hand on Ryan's forehead. "Perhaps it's something the doctors missed."
      Lyn put her hand on Ryan's arm. "Ryan, what was the last thing you were looking at before going blind?"
      Ryan looked embarrassed, blushing red. "At the risk of sounding old fashion, I saw a rather healthy young woman by the gift shop."
      "Oh," Lyn said knowingly, seeing what Ryan referred to. "That's an Angelican woman."
      "That big?" Hanna was thoroughly surprized. 400 years ago, a woman with such carriage only existed on the internet, and shouldn't be standing, much less walking.
      Paul noted the perplexed look on the couples' faces. It wasn't unlike the same expressions found on vacationers from Earth when confronted with the same thing. "It's a cultural tradition among Angelican woman. During their child-rearing years they make use of nanites to augment their busts to such... proportions."
      Hanna watched as the woman, obviously a mother, picked up a child and dispensed a hug, looking like she was pressing a large doll into a pair of pillows. That the woman was able to do that gave rise to another question. "So they're real?"
      Now it was Paul's turn to blush. "As you would say four centuries ago, not one drop of saline or silicone. Nanites, in addition to making breasts bigger, have made them lighter, stronger, and more pliable that you would expect."
      "It's the same thing that happened back on Antigua. I have boobie blindness," Ryan admitted. "When I saw Nancy and Jordan's magically enlarged boobies I went temporarily blind."
      "How did you cure it?" asked Paul.
      Now holding Hanna's hand normally, Ryan turned to the source of Paul's voice. "Ummm.... me and Hanna need to go somewhere private for a minute to make this work."
      "There." Lyn pointed to a restroom designated for mothers with infants. "I'll make sure it's clear first."
      "Thank you," said a grateful Hanna. After getting the all-clear Hanna walked arm-in-arm with Ryan to the restroom. Three minutes later both emerged, Ryan blinking his brown eyes as Hanna gave a final promise to the blouse she wore.
      "What did you do?" Lyn asked honestly.
     "It's rather delicate and not something to talk about in public," said a relieved Ryan. "Warn me if more of those 'Angelican' women are around so I can avert my eyes."
      "That may be a problem." Lyn's eyes were slightly glazed over as she accessed her 'ware. "A bus of Angelican families from Kendleborn arrived minutes ago, and they're between us and the engine exhibit."
      Ryan stood close to Hanna, his arm linked to hers. "Well, looks like Hanna will have to lead her man through the bosomy gauntlet. Got any dark sunglasses so they won't see my closed eyes?"

6
Also about on the day after Christmas, 2416 were Tobias and June, entering an antique shop just a minute after it opened. There they found Tomas Brownstone looking pale with a layer of sweat on his brow, standing behind the counter. "You look sick," said Tobias. "You're better off at home."
      "It must've been some undercooked turkey," said the shop owner in a weary voice. Actually he was very nervous. Having been in the store for an hour already, Tomas' heart nearly exploded when he heard the door chime. From his pocket came a small card. Embedded in it was the archaic memory ship that Tobias gave him earlier. "As it was my project I had to give the chip to you personally."
      "Where are the girls?" Tobias said distracted, looking at the chip.
      "I gave them the day off so they can take advantage of the post-Christmas bargain sales," Tomas said, making his voice sounding froggy to reinforce the perception that he was sick.
      "Was it tough to figure out how to read such old data, Tomas? How about those 'jay-pegs?"
      "It took me awhile, but I had a brainstorm," Tomas boasted, though his froggy throat threaten to cough. "I still had a mid 21st Century computer that I frankensteined with a graphics analyzer. More importantly, it had a chip reader, and after a bit of coaxing I got it to work."
      "Bully for you, Tomas. The department will compensate you."
      June looked around the shop, her eye landing on the transparent case that held the VCR machine. "I imagine you receive an increase in business in the weeks leading up to Christmas, Mr. Brownstone," she said.
      "Yes I do. People like to have a showpiece on the mantle and all that. Are you looking for something in particular, Ms..."
      The tall and handsomely endowed brunette woman turned, a police badge on display in her hand. "Parlor, Sergeant-Detective June Parlor, NDPD. Have you experienced an increase of early 21st-Century electronic items appearing in your store?"
      "Why, no, actually," said Tomas casually even as his heart threatened to vomit. "Only Mr. Edding's chip fits that description."
      June walked to the counter in such a manner that her blouse-covered basketball lungs rose and fell under the conforming fabric like golfballs in a cloth bag. It had the effect of making Tomas sweat more. "We have reason to believe that the party responsible for stealing a 2010 model of a Zobe Z-Tablet that belonged to the Woosters will attempt to sell it at an underground auction." She leaned forward on the counter so that the little bit of cleavage that did show was in full view of Tomas' clearly delighted eyes. "Before that, they will likely have it appraised and even see if it can be repaired, or have the data stored on it retrieved. Has anyone come into your store and made inquires, even oblique ones, on having 21st Century devices appraised and repaired?"
      "None, Detective. Tobias was the first one in years to bring in something that old and unique."
      "I see." June stood up to her height, hands on her hips. "As you're an acknowledged expert on ancient electronics the thieves may try to contact you, under an alias of course, on getting it appraised. Please report anything you hear about the Z-Tablet to Mr. Eddings. You'll not only earn the gratitude of the department, but that of the Woosters as well."
      "You have my word." He spoke resolutely even as his eyes stayed on June's chest, imagining how sensual it had to be without clothing on it.
      Tobias pocketed the chip. "Take care of yourself, Tomas, and thanks again."
      "Thank you." In his credit Tomas did look at June's face while speaking this time.
      Both officers turned to leave, but June stopped at the VCR display case, nose wrinkled. "What is that smell, Mr. Brownstone?" With her police 'ware she suppressed the alarm systems, lifting the lid and thus was rewarded with an even more pungent version of the odor.
      "Oh, that," Tomas said nonchalantly. "A customer brought in a 20th Century video tape machine to sell, but his pet dog peed on it while sitting in the backseat of his car. It lowered the value considerably."
      June made her trademark disarming smile. "I imagine a man with your skill can easily clean it up and sell it for more than you paid for it. G'day."
      Once the duo was out the door Tomas allowed himself to relax. Now if only he could convince Mr. Big that nothing was wrong then he might live to see another day. He had only to wait an hour to find out. At 10 a.m. sharp the man in question came in, bowler hat on his head and wearing a heavy coat with a row of large buttons. He was followed by Carolyn, Ninon, and Jolie in large bushbear fur coats. The man called Albert came in last, turned the closed sign outwards to the street, locking the door and closing the shades.
       "Ah," Big espoused, "I had planned on being here at 9 a.m., but," he indicated to the trio of lovelies behind him, "I got distracted in the shower this morning. It's a pity you had to work on Christmas, but should I find what I'm looking for on that tablet you'll get a bonus." He held out his hand. "If you please, Mr. Brownstone."
       Tomas handed the tablet over in an daze, eyes not on Big but on his three employees. The bushbear furs they wore came from a particular species that was heavily protected and illegal as Hell. An undeniable glow radiated from the girls' faces, their make-up and attitude amplifying their allure to a level Tomas had never seen before. He had no time to daydream as Big barked an expletive.
       "Fuddleducks! This cannot be!" The man's hand flew across the tablet's screen with such fluency that it was clear he used a similar device before and often. "Are you sure you recovered as many files as possible, Mister Brownstone?"
      "No-one else could have achieved as much as I did, Mr. Big," said Tomas defiantly.
      Big shoved the old device in the techno-wizard's face. "Explain this, then! This shows that the chip slot had been accessed last night. Did you copy some information from the Tablet onto a chip?"
      Tomas girded himself and told his lie to Big. "I had a client that possessed an ancient memory chip. A working chip would fetch more at auction, so he brought it here to test. As the Z-Tab needed to test its chip slot I saw a way to accomplish two tasks at once."
      "God help you if you're holding out on me," Big spoke with menace fit for a drill instructor. "I'll make it so that the only way you can operate the Z-Tab is with your big toe!" Wanting to grasp Tomas by the collar it was glimpsing a paperback on the counter that stayed Big's hand. He picked it up, looking at the dog-eared corners and the yellow-aged paper of the faded graphic novel. "Ah, it's a 200 year-old first print of Dai Yuki, the comic that Great Snow was based on. In addition to a having a stuck-up, self-opinionated full-of-shit protagonist, Dai Yuki had far more gratuitous, ill-contrived sex scenes than most Japanese graphic novels of that era." A moment later the hating grimace was made into a grin fit for the Grinch.
     Big dropped the copy of Dai Yuki on the counter, looking at his lovelies. "Girls! I want you to search this place for an old memory chip. Check his computers too. Any hardcopies he made in the last day from that chip I want as well. If it comes to more 'direct' measures, you have my permission to pleasure whatever information he has about the chip out of him. Call Albert to pick you up when you're done."
      "Oh," spoke the most sensual Carolyn, "that might take all day and night. We'll make him melt like butter."
       "That I have no doubt," Big purred as he kissed his girls in turn. Only when Big and Albert left, with Jolie closing and locking the door, did the trio removed their bushbear coats. Tomas was flabbergasted. Being so preoccupied with Big, he didn't take much notice of the girls' chests until now. Had he done so earlier, he would've gained a hint on just how big they had to be to make an impression on the coats they wore, and what an impression! All three wore skirts so short that they might as well have been very thick belts. The hair was done into ponytails, dipping into yawning cleavage like the rope of an aspiring mountain climber. Being so big the breasts might as well have been naked, the blouses so abbreviated that nipple slippage was apparent. A realization struck him dumb, only to be broken a moment later by Jolie's sweet voice. "What is it, Bossy?"
      "Umm... errr... how 'big' are you three," he managed, eyes going from girl to girl but always on the full, firm, proud, succulent breasts.
       Carolyn obliged, hold up a black-colored metallic letter she wore around her neck. "I'm a V-cup. Biggy gave us some of those Big Brew beers that the Fuzz failed to find. Drinking two or more, one after the other, makes the overall expansion bigger than expected."
      Jolie drew her letter necklace out of her bosomy valley like a helo rescuing a stranded hiker, slow and deliberate. Tomas had no control over his eyes. "As for me, I'm a S-cup. You'll sprain your hand if you try to glom me, but I won't blame you if you try."
      Ninon had to rummage through her cleavage for a half a minute like a person looking for something in a junk drawer. Gyrations and vibrations of boob flesh made Tomas' pants feel tighter. She finally fished out her letter necklace, even showing it off like it was a prize Basspike. "P-cup for me! Oh, I'm going to have so much fun pressing my puppies into your back. Hopefully I won't break it."
       "You mean you hope we don't break his back." Carolyn glided over and applied her own form of voluminous pressure on Tomas' chest. "Now, Bossy, where shall we start looking for that chippy-whippy Big wants so badly, hmmm?"

********

It was an all-day affair at the Canberra Colonial Heritage Museum, and after dinner in a circa 2000 Chicago-themed restaurant the Woosters were treated to a game of bowling. Ryan had expected holographic pins or anti-gravity lanes, but was pleasantly surprized to see that it was the same game he played as a child back in Wisconsin. Only the score display made a bow to future tech, being an animated 3D display. As for the patrons there was something that Hanna couldn't quite put her finger on, so she ask a question. "Lyn, any particular reason why we're at this bowling alley?"
      "It's where the New Darwin Police have their league," Lyn said, putting on her wrist band. She had brought a pair of slacks, wearing them instead of the knee length skirt she had on earlier. "This place has a Police presence every night, whether to bowl or to eat."
      "Especially eating," Paul quipped as he brought in a bowl of jackalope ribs with char sauce from the bowling center's diner. "If there weren't so many jackalopes Lynnae would've made the species extinct."
       Lyn pinched Paul's tummy with one hand while the other took a sauce-dripping rib. "Shut up, you. For that you're paying for the next game."
      "Thanks for the ribs," Hanna said as she reached for her second one. "I hope they're empty calories, being the future and all."
      Ryan inspected the rib he just denuded of meat. "Paul, did the media get wind of what we really look like now? I noticed that I can't access your 'ethersphere' with my Z-Tab. Are they able to track it with the search inquiries?"
      "That's a yes to the first part," the officer admitted. "There was another press release from the New Darwin Sun. It had a hospital photo of you two in physical therapy. More damaging, Tobias informed us that you were caught on security cameras at the museum, despite his best efforts to censor them, and that somehow those images were released to various media pools. If reporters do show up they'll have to get past several burly patrolmen."
      "How did you know all that?" Ryan questioned. "We didn't see you talking into a... Oh, that 'wetware' you mentioned."
      Paul tapped the side of his head. "Yeah, it's all Bourke Street in here sometimes, but it's worth it. For you, it's like having a built in cell phone that doesn't cause brain damage."
      Finishing here third rib, Lyn sounded as guilty as she looked. "There's also a selfish reason why you're here. Two of my friends wanted to meet you, and this was the best possible place to arrange it on such short notice. Ah, they're here." Lyn stood up and waved her arm to someone in the distance.
      From his vantage point Ryan initially only saw a man, a very tall man that would've been at home on a basketball court, walking through the spectator gallery. He had a boyish face that women found pleasant, as evident on how Hanna's smile was natural and not forced. It was only when he was much closer that Ryan saw the second person, a dark-haired woman that was even shorter that Lyn and just as stacked and shapely. Her tiny hand was completely enclosed in the giant's huge paw, and it was she that was leading what obviously was her boyfriend, making one think of a doxie pulling a passive mastiff behind it.
      Hugs and handshakes given, Lyn made the introductions. "This is Amber MacRoy, fellow officer and the strongest woman on Outback. That massive mountain of a man is Bert Carson, a high school physical education teacher and her fiance."
      Amber offered her hand, shaking Ryan's while making sure her grip with just right. "Wow, I'm so glad that we got to meet you before the rush. To meet someone from the 21st Century is like Christmas on Bourke Street."
      "Thank you," Ryan replied. "I must say the only thing more lovelier than Outback shelias is my wife."
      Hanna pinched Ryan's side to keep him honest. "Good save, hubby, though I find the men here are giving you a run for your money." She reached out to accept Burt's offered hand only to see him get on one knee like a knight before his liege lady and kissing the top of her's. Now it was Ryan's turn to pinch his honey who by now was blushing with the intensity of five women.
      "You'll have to pardon him," Amber giggled as she coaxed Burt back up. "It's like second nature for him now, getting down so I don't strain my neck."
      Burt's smile was fit to eat pie as well as giving praise. "Well, it's better than the alternative, picking you up like a lawn gnome. Except lawn gnomes don't were short skirts and heartmoon pan..."
       Amber pinched Burt's thigh, and as he was that big and tough he could take what his super-strong woman could dish out. "No-one needs to know that, Burt," she chided.
      For two hours the engaged couple talked with the married one, all the while being taught the finer points of bowling by Lyn and Paul. Amber had the hardest time at it, for she tended to throw the ball instead of letting it roll down the lane. She also had a more hungry tummy than Lyn, looking perfectly guilty for wolfing down the rest of the jackalope ribs. She bought two bowls to make amends. With his big hands a regulation ball was hard to find for Bert, and even then it took some last minute work by the alley's shopman to adjust the fingerholes. Ryan and Hanna beat their hosts in the second game after gaining their lane-legs in the first, showing that 'age and experience always trounces youth and energy.'
      The fun came to an end when June made a 'ware call to Lyn. [We got ourselves a solid lead,] June said, her voice playing in Lyn's mind. [One Mr. Tomas Brownstone, owner of an antique store, had been working on the Z-Tab that one Mr. Big gave him several weeks ago. A patrol unit responded to a silent alarm from the store, and found Mr. Brownstone in an advanced state of discombobulation, thanks to a sexual interrogation performed by Brownstone's three female employees now suborned by Big.. He spilled his guts, saying that Big had been looking for a file on the Z-Tab and now believes that it's on the chip that Tobias has in his possession.]
      [The chip that Ryan said he had while in the ice cave,] Lyn pointed out. [I take it Mr. Brownstone didn't say if he made a copy of the chip contents?]
       [The store is a mess, Lyn, and Brownstone's computers have been hosed. Brownstone does believe he's seen the file Big is after, and it concerns us. More precisely, our ancestors.]

7
After taking the Woosters back to Felicity's apartment Lyn and Paul went to Central Station. Waiting for them in Room 405 were June, Nadia, and Tobias. Captain Patricia Laramie, their superior, stood by the window, looking out at the rain fleeced night. For a woman over 100 she didn't look a day over 55. "Sorry to have interrupted your evening," she said, turning to the detectives. "With the testimony and technical assistance of Mr. Brownstone, and confirmation from Tobias, I'm certain Mr. Big was after just one thing, a file on the memory chip. It fits in to what we know of his pattern of thinking and reasoning."
      "It's a pic of Nancy and Jordan, isn't it?" Lynnae asserted. "A pic of them having their naked norks fit for a Cloud 9 hostess being pawed and glommed by Big."
      "This is Big we're talking about," June said pointedly. "He would steal a thousand candy bars just to find the one that had the prize-winning wrapper."
      "Aside from Brownstone, I have seen the pic, as well as Tobias," Laramie intoned. She noted the brief grimaces on Lyn and June's faces. "The press have come to expect 'titillation' from you two, and if they see this it'll generate an unneeded amount of attention, especially in regards to the Woosters. Whatever pleasure Big may draw from embarrassing the both of you from this is academic, for there is something else on the chip. Files, financial files, to be precise, and locations where Big kept caches of ill-gotten treasure back on Earth over 400 years ago."
      Lyn's famous righteously indignant look came over her face. "He dug out the Woosters just to get some treasure maps? Does he believe that Ryan knows about them, and only made sure he was brought back to life just in case they weren't on the Z-Tab but in his head?"
      "Which makes guarding the Woosters your team's top priority, Miss Wilcox. Until authorities on Earth have investigated those caches and publicize them Big will try to get to Ryan to find out what he knows." Laramie's eyes locked onto Lyn and June's, holding them until both acknowledged. "You'll have help, and you will pass on all information gathered on Big, regardless of source or significance. Chief Talbert is aware of the situation, and the Commissioner is actively watching."
      "As if you needed to remind us," quipped June, realizing a fraction of a second too late that she spoke without thinking.
      Though her expression didn't change, Laramie's presence was that of a disappointed parent. "Such a mouth, and it's been only four days since you've become a detective, and for the second time I may add." Those words weren't meant for June alone. Laramie waited as the air in the room became heavy and still. "I think I do need to remind you, Miss Parlor, as well as everyone else in this room. What happened six days ago, thank to the Mayor's gratitude, has gone a long way in rectifying what happened in the Mountain White case three years ago. Don't do Mr. Big any favors by acting impulsively."
      "We won't, Captain," Lynnae said. "But the same cannot be said of Big."

********

The next morning Ryan and Hanna were awaken by Smudge plying his kisses and cold nose in the ear again, and for breakfast the couple sneaked a strip of bacon to the feisty doxie under the table. Without a doubt they now had a friend for life. For the day's activity the couple was going on the first part of their tour of Victoria Tower with Nadia and Harold. Seeing Nadia clearly for the first time made Hanna wonder how Ryan still possessed the power of rational thought in the presence of the tall, exotic cop. Especially after Nadia undid the top three buttons of the blouse that labored to cover her oversized basketball breasts, only to settle Smudge in he cleavage, the little dog's movement causing the twin mountains of boobs flesh to act like thick jello. Hanna had to hold onto Ryan's hand a little bit tighter to keep him focus, less he drift off and started to sketch Nadia on his Z-Tab replica. Now with just his head poking out, looking pleased and alert, Smudge made a light 'woof' of contentment. With Felicity accompanying as well the group headed out.
      During the busiest part of the day there were over 100,000 people in the 2km-tall tower, ranging from residents, workers, students, and shoppers. Following a tour of one of the atriums the group went to one of the shopping levels. Since Nadia was leading the way, the first stop was a high-end clothing store. There she treated the Woosters to a fitting, with Ryan getting a tuxedo and Hanna a dress.
      "Wow, this is just like from an anime," Ryan professed as a holoimager in the fitting room overlaid a suit pattern over him. A tailor made the changes with a file pad, each virtual alteration getting a collective yes or no from Hanna, Nadia, and Felicity. For Ryan it was like getting his confirmation suit all over again. When it came time for Hanna she went with the traditional little black dress. With Harold's coaxing Ryan had the tailor made the dress shorter and show more bosom. "Keep it up and I'll end up naked," Hanna gushed, her hands caressing the sides of the photonic dress.
      "You better stop right there," Nadia suggested. "She's right on the current fashion for a respectable little black dress."
      "So speaks the fashion plate," Harold smirked. For that he got a pinch to the waist and a reproachful 'woof' from Smudge.
      "It looks lovely. I wore the same style dress when I was a youngin," commented Felicity. "Let's have the dress made up. It'll only take fifteen minutes."
     Ryan looked at the hologram overlay on his wife with lusting eyes. "That fast? Well, it is rather small, and there'll be no bra in the way. So she'll need only discreet panties and nipple caps..."
      "There's the matter of shoes, a small purse, jewelry, hair and make up." Hanna said with relish. "It's not so simple as throwing on pants and a coat, Mr. Lazy. Why don't you get some aftershave with Harold while me and the girls finish up here." She turned to Nadia. "Umm... I don't want to sound rude or ungrateful, but who's paying for all this?"
     "Don't worry that sweat head of yours, Hanna," Nadia reassured. "The Governor is providing funds from his personal account, and speaking of the Governor there's a reason why we're doing this now. You two will be guests of His Honor at a dinner and show here in one of the tower's dining clubs."
      "That's great," said Ryan, arm around Hanna to draw her in close. "Now only if weren't not mobbed in the meantime." He pointed to a gathering throng of people, all talking in hushed voices to each other or into their minicomps. Some even had writing styluses in hand, ready to get some autographs. All that was holding them back was a line of plainsclothes NDPD officers and deputy marshals.
      "Oh, Fuddleducks," sighed Nadia. "We'll keep them in check until you two are done with your fittings."
      In the back of the growing crowd was one short boy that didn't do anything to get to the front. Not that he was timid, but was prudent, for it wasn't a boy but Mr. Big in disguise. He got onto a bench instead, getting the view he needed. He had to see for himself how well the Woosters were doing, and would've gotten closer had it not been for Smudge. Even with scents and smells to mask his olfactory presence he knew the vicious rat dog could sense him if he got close enough, or if there were fewer people around. Ryan looked as he did over four hundred years ago, like a professional student, and Hanna had a pretty face and a natural, firm F-cup bust that Big appreciated. He watched them, and thanks to his eavesdropping devices he heard the mention about the Governor's dinner. One way or another he wanted to get to Ryan and find out what knew about the files. There were treasures on Earth that Big had hidden, and he wanted to access and sell them. For all Big knew Ryan could've been clever and squirreled that information deep in his mind. Just an hour alone to practice hypnosis techniques would be enough...
      While his mind plotted and planned his heart nearly skipped a beat. Smudge, up to now looking happily out at the crowd, rose out of Nadia's cleavage and planted his front paws on his mistresses' firm blouse-covered breasts, looking like a tank commander surveying the terrain from a turret's cupola. His head darted from one side to another while making a long, agitated whine. Nadia drew out her wonderful pet and placed him on the ground, at which point the low-set dog moved with a purpose to the fitting rooms. With his humans in tow Smudge ran his paw up and down on the door of the room next to the one Hanna was using. The shop's security chief checked her minicomp and unceremoniously opened the door. What was found was a surprized woman, a petite brunette in a knee-length coat, her custom minicomp pressed up against the shared wall.
      "What's all this then?" said Nadia, using a time-honored police expression. "Have you gone all pervy?"
      "Nothing of the sort, ma'am," came the woman's reply, trying to sound indignant. "I was taking photos of myself in my new coat."
      The security chief wasn't impressed. "Is that so?" She pulled the minicomp off the wall and accessed the device's memory. What she found were thermal images of Hanna, all depicting her in unflattering states of undress. "Odd, the walls are thermal-neutral, so how..."
      "I know." Nadia entered the room, making the shorter woman back up in understandable dread. With Smudge at her feet she pointed to a spot on the wall, her 'ware-enhanced eyes easily spotting the discrepancy. For the security chief's benefit the tall detective used a subdermal laser pointer in her right index finger. "That's a 0.5 millimeter hole leading to the other side of the wall." She then placed that finger on the minicomp, eyes briefly glazed over as she consulted her 'ware. "Her minicomp is a custom job, complete with a tiny drill and length of micro-fiber optic line. Such things are used by pervies and certain media reporters. I've accessed the database. You're freelancing for the New Darwin Sun."
     "You've violated several rules, missy," said the chief. "At a minimum you'll be banned from the store for life, and then there's a plethora of laws regarding invasion of privacy."
      It was the look on the woman's face that told Nadia something that wasn't in any database. She regarded the woman with a disarming smile. "It's okay, you can tell us. Just cop to the fact that you're working for Mr. Big and the courts will be lenient."
      "How did you know?" The photographer blurted out, covering her mouth a fraction of a second later.
     "Open your coat." Both Nadia and the chief waited as the woman reluctantly removed her large, heavy coat. Beneath was a basketball bustline easily the same size of Nadia's, but on her smaller frame it looked that much larger. "Thanks to my 'ware, I found your employment file at the New Darwin Sun. You're a freelance photo journalist, and were just a b-cup three weeks ago. In a pair of security photos a day apart you went from twin pancake stacks to balloon smuggler. And no they weren't plastiskin boobs, for the sensors read them as the real deal. So," she placed a consoling hand on the woman's shoulder, "I imagine you were interviewing a disguised Mr. Big, who then worked his charm and spirited you away to one of his pleasure apartments. While there, he had you drink several bottles of Big Brew or Bubbles to make up for your perceived malnourishment in the breast department..."
      The little woman cried, burying her head into Nadia's chest while embracing her with weak arms. Nadia caressed the hair on the brunette's head. "That's good, let it out. Very few women could resist Big's charms. Not only am I one of them, but I've wiped the floor with him a few times. He'll be punished, you'll see."

********

At the main subway station of New Darwin, the Cloverton, Lynnae and June had lunch in a Jackalope Jack's diner and compared notes. They did 'ware investigations of the photo journalist's list of recent interviews. To a one, all were of businessmen that had been struggling due to the recession but in the past year had seen positive growth. All had received funds from a bank at highly generous rates and conditions, a bank suspected to be in the back pocket of Mr. Big.
      After lunch the buxom duo went to see their most trusted and valued source of street information, Jimmy the Shine. They found him at his usual spot, smiling as though he had expected to see them that day. He gestured to his portable elevated seat he called the Throne. "Ah, how are my fine lady detectives today? Did you have a good Christmas to go along with those sergeant stripes?"
      Lynnae took the offered seat, left boot out for Jimmy to work his shine magic. "An excellent one, you rascal. Did you like the Christmas Eve bonus?"
      Jimmy looked at the boot like a sculptor would to a piece of marble on his workbench. "Even more now that I know why you needed that last-minute shine. Did you make a favorable impression with the Woosters?" He cleared off scuffs of dirt before applying the shine base.
      "Very favorable," June mused. "Especially when Mr Wooster was able to see us clearly."
      Base applied, Jimmy worked his applicator brush over the boot. "What man, even a 21st Century man, couldn't form a favorable impression after seeing you two?"
       "Not any men that we know of, Jimmy," Lynnae replied. "Except those that get favors of the monetary kind. Like certain business men that were in the news recently." She went on to described the men, Jimmy humming occasionally as he worked the shining cloth on the left boot.
      "Ah, keep this between your shoes and socks, Miss Wilcox, but Big has been on a recruiting drive to get new junior members for his Big Crime Cabal Incorporated syndicate." After appraising the job on the left boot Jimmy had Lyn put her right boot up for him to work on. "Those fellas you mentioned had passed the test by turning in a profit, and he's going to treat them to a New Year's Eve party. One of them is a customer of mine, you know, and he said something to the effect on how nice it would be to get some 'seat time' with that Wooster woman, being 400 years of hotness and all that."
      June slipped a $200 cred-card (flash-programmed by her 'ware while it was in her hand) into Jimmy's kitbox with the practiced grace of a pick pocket as she bent down to get a closer look at his shoe shine work. "Thanks, Jimmy. If you get word on where that party is being held..."
      "You'll tip me the same amount you gave me just now. Since I know the amount you gave was generous your shine will be on the house."
      "Ah, so there is a generous heart in there after all," teased Lyn. "One has to peel Big apart like an onion to find his."

8
Big felt the sneeze coming and had a tissue in hand just in time. He tossed the result into a waste basket, looking now at the three current companions. Carolyn was dressed in a bartender outfit, complete with thin black bowtie and a black vest that couldn't come close to be buttoned up over her white blouse. Ninon and Jolie were decked in stylized 1950's era drive-in diner server outfits, complete with replica roller skates and caps. For now the two had knee and elbow pads as they sought to master the roller skates while being so well-endowed. After landing on her butt on the luxury penthouse floor for the fifth time Jolie whimpered. "Ouch! Biggy, why do we have wear these outfits? We're not into roleplaying."
      "This is not roleplaying, my sugar sweet," cooed Big. "I'm having guests on the 30th, and I need you and Ninon to be proficient roller skaters by then. It's a theme party, and you two will have to play the part."
      "The 30th? Not New Year's Eve?" questioned Carolyn as she prepared an old fashion, reading the instructions from a file pad.
      "Yes, the 30th. It'll just be you three, me, Albert, and some special guests for New Years."
      Ninon, having only taken a spill twice in the last half hour, was getting a hang of the skates faster than Jolie. "Oh, who's the guest?"
      With lusty eyes, and not just because the way Ninon and Jolie's busts really filled out the short-sleave open collar shirts they wore, Big grinned as he stroked a sleeping Pumpkin on his lap. "You'll know soon enough. In fact, you three will make this guest feel right at home."

*******

On the 28th the Woosters finished their tour of Victoria Tower with Nadia, Harold and Felicity. This was followed by some site-seeing of the old business district, taking photos like the tourists they pretended to be. On occassion people would recognize the Woosters indirectly, for news about the 'Peeping Tammy' also made mention of Nadia. Seeing the very photogenic detective with trademark doxie in her cleavage made one reasonably suspect the Woosters were nearby. When this happened the group moved along, melding into the crowd until the next photo opportunity arrived.
      Leaving Smudge back at Nadia's house for the evening, the group went to a steak restaurant for dinner and then went to see the Nutcracker at the Cookhouse Opera. The other detectives joined them, more to guard the couple than to enjoy the performance. It didn't help matters that a spotlight shone on them at the end, making for a difficult exit. By happenstance Amber and Bert was there, and together they plowed a route through the crowd to the service entrance and the waiting unmarked van. Like the leaked photos, Lynnae suspected it was Big that was behind the spotlight caper. She was proven right as the technician running the light was quite pneumatic, and records showed said tech was only modestly endowed just five weeks ago. It seemed like Big was on a roll, seducing and enhancing women regardless of their wealth or level of employment. The tech admitted as such, after being talked to by June, using a technique to break Big's control over her mind. Lyn resolved to make Big get his comeuppance for his unnatural manipulation of women.
      It was a big day on the 29th. With June and Tobias as escorts the Woosters visited the New Darwin Zoo. This was their first true look at Outback wildlife, and not a few times Hanna hid behind Ryan, especially when it came to the bushbears. Ryan flinched when the 3-meter-tall, 400 kilo animals seemed to be looking right at them with their four wolf-like eyes on a head that resembled a mash between a bear and panther. The predators all gathered at the edge of the enclosure, following the couple until they were literally out of sight. "That was unnerving," said Hanna. "Are they always like that?"
      "It's rare for them to show so much interest in humans," June said, hand on Hanna's shoulder. "Their senses are all highly tuned, so perhaps they noticed just how different you and Ryan are compared to everyone else."
      Ryan wrapped his arm around Hanna's waist. "Perhaps they know a bag of sweet meats when they see it." He got rewarded with a pinch to the gut.
      "So says the walking t-bone steak," Hanna giggled, kissing Ryan on the cheek.
       In the afternoon the first interview of the Woosters was held at the studios of the Outback News Network. Only at the last moment was the interviewer decided on, and it had the potential for awkwardness in regards to Ryan. The interviewer was one Gloria Jonas, senior anchor of the primetime news. Last year she was under the spell of Mr. Big before being rescued by Lynnae and Nadia, and like all other women so mesmerized Gloria was made pneumatic in chest, but in this case as big as the typical Angelican woman. Rather than explain and in the process be made the butt of bad jokes for the rest of his life Ryan decided to tough it out like a man. Predictably he suffered another bought of boobie blindness then and there, which won't look good for the cameras at all. Tobias came to his aid, giving the afflicted man a pair of true-dark sunglasses. Finding that he had recovered, Ryan elected to keep the sunglasses on, explaining to Gloria that his eyes were still sensitive to light. He looked toward the spot Gloria sat for the entire time during the interview, able to see yet unable to view her directly lest he became blinded again.
      After questions about 21st Century life and the progress from their discovery and recovery in the hospital Gloria asked the big one. Having been advised by June, the Woosters stated that it was Mr. Big that recovered them from the ice cave, their revival just an afterthought as it was the Z-Tab Big was after. It's a rare antique, the couple told an enraptured Gloria, certainly worthy of the attention of the likes of Mr. Big. When asked what they knew about the infamous supercriminal both said only what they found out in the public record and the incidents of the two Big-inflated women. In a dash of relish, Hanna said that Mr. Big was nothing but a 'sun-dried crabapple' that needed mesmerizing powers because no amount of money would coax a woman to be with him. The look on Gloria as well as June and Tobias' faces was blank. If anything was to provoke a response from Big then insulting him on live media was a sure way to do it.
      The interview resumed, Gloria asking about Ryan's artisitic talent. The young man happily affirmed his artstyle, knowning that any collector of his art would simply make noise if he claimed otherwise, and offered to sketch Gloria then and there on his replica Z-Tab. With stylus in hand Ryan proceeded to work his magic, and for Hanna she believed magic was involved for Ryan made a very accurate sketch of Gloria, right down to the nipples making the bra and blouse above them rise in small, notable shield-like mounds.
       "How were you able to draw?" Hanna buzzed quietly into Ryan's ear during a commercial break. "You can't see past those sunglasses, and if you did..."
      "As if you had to be reminded, honey," Ryan said under a smile. "I have an excellent memory, and I am 'expert' in drawing big-lung women, especially on a Z-Tab. I could do it blindfolded, you know."
      "You mean you can draw while boobie-blinded," teased Hanna as she played with Ryan's sunnies, alternately making him blind and unblind in quick succession. "If I had know that just dark sunglasses would've worked then it would've saved on some awkward moments."
      "You'll get an akward moment if you keep that up. The interview is about to start up again."
      The one question the Woosters dreaded was finally asked. As for what they were going to do now, Ryan said he would still pursue a career as a commercial artist while Hanna admitted it was going to take some new schooling so as to be employed as an accountant. Honestly they knew some major adapting to 25th Century life was required, but how much and for how long they'll have to depend on charity and warding off the media and assorted werdios they had no clue.
      After the interview the Woosters went back to Felicity's apartment. With a ring of plainsclothes officers and marshals outside and Lynnae, Paul and Smudge on the inside the couple changed into the clothes they were fitted for two days earlier. Tonight they were going to be treated to a dinner at a high-end restaurant in Victoria Tower, courtesy of Outback's Governor Fletcher. Ryan was done first, his tuxedo a perfect fit due to the active fabric making subtle adjustments. Next came Felicity and Hanna. Dressed in a ankle-length sleeveless black dress and silky shawl Felicity looked like she came from a well-off high-society family. For Hanna it was the little black dress, complete with bare back down to her waist and strapless. The lower half stopped nine centimeters short of her knees and had large v-shaped cuts on either side.Her dress was made of active fabric as well, adhering to her body and accentuating her swells and curves. As for the dress slippers they had memory plastic heels, allowing a change in height from two centimeters to nine centimeters. Felecity had helped with the makeup and jewelry, and Ryan, upon seeing his wife so adorned, complete with a small rose in the cleavage, felt like he was back in 2012, celebrating the second wedding anniversary. Hanna had a little black dress back then, and Ryan privately wished they had the apartment alone tonight to address his sudden rise in anxiousness.
      Felicity turned to her granddaughter. "Now it's your turn, sweetie. Seeing how Paul is already dressed for this evening we'll be waiting for you."
      "It won't take long, Grandma," Lynnae blushed. "It's a tiny thing like Hanna's, and I hope the active fabric is still good after all these years."
      "Years?" Ryan asked.
      "Back in college, over twenty years ago," Felicity said, grinning like the prideful grandmother she was. She went to her desk, opened a drawer and withdrew an old fashion envelope. "I got her a little black dress for her 22nd birthday." She shook the envelope, holding it up to her ear. Lightly shaking it provided that there was something inside it. "The dress folded up well for being so small."
      "Grandma!" Lynnae admonished, taking the envelope. "You gave me your little black dress back then. As I recall front what you told me, you got the dress as a 1st wedding anniversary gift from Grandpa, and it was even smaller on your body."
      "Well, when you got it, flaunt it, sweetie. I'm sure Paul would like to see you flaunt more often."
      "Grandma!"

9
The Bush Telly, located on the south side of the 250th floor of Victoria Tower, was, despite its name, a high-end restaurant and club. Security, both physical and electronic, was fit to guard the Commonwealth prime minister himself. Aside from the Woosters there was Planetary Governor Fletcher, New Darwin Mayor Blamey, a good number of their subordinates, and other notables on Outback. Being the guests of honor, the Woosters received each one in turn before finally getting to their table. Ryan kept up appearances, but in his manly heart he was lusting like a 16-year-old boy. While the 'older' women wore conservative dresses like Felicity and Lynnae's boss Captain Laramie the younger ones (he didn't dare hazard a guess if 40 was considered young in a society with life extension treatments) had many variations of the little black dress. To a one, every woman was at least a d-cup, the average size on Outback, with a handful that were significantly larger. Thankfully there were no Angelican-sized women, but there were a few in June and Nadia's category. He patted the pocket on his tuxedo that held the midnight sunnies for reassurance, in case a very pneumatic woman does show up this night.
      Had it been 2012 Hanna would've sworn she was at a movie premier in Hollywood. Except in this case all the women had natural breasts, albeit built up by 'nanites' instead of bags of silicone or saline. With all the partially-exposed bosoms on display it was a feast for men's eyes. Hanna allowed for the hungry-eyes Ryan had, but with the lustful look he gave her earlier at Felicity's apartment it was clear Ryan knew which side his toast was buttered on. At the dining table the couple sat to the Governor's right with the police detectives across from them. Paul sat next to Lynnae, still displaying subtle hints about their relationship such as light touches to the hand and arm and occasional words whispered into the ear. Next to them was June and her boyfriend Greg Norbert, a tax lawyer. Greg looked heavy-set, but was referred as 'stout' by June in genuine affection. Amber, though not a detective, was in attendance along with her fiance Bert. Hanna suspected they were there for 'muscle' in case of trouble, and having seen a demonstration of Amber's considerable strength she felt quite safe. Tobias came by himself, but by the time he was seated a female subordinate from Central, part of the on-site electronic surveillance team, was with him. She was endowed as Lynnae and showed off more of her chest charms, just one deep inhale away from busting out of her little dress. That just left Nadia and Harold, as they were still absent...
      A loud swallow came from Ryan, and Hanna had to squeeze his hand to keep him grounded in reality when she saw what was approaching. Harold was in a tuxedo, looking all the more handsome and suave, but it was Nadia that caused Ryan's physical reaction. The brown skinned officer wore a fuchsia colored dress that went down to her ankles, though the right side had a slit that reached halfway up her thigh. Already tall, she wore high heel dress slippers that easily gave her three inches of height over Harold. Nadia's dark red hair reach her shoulders like silky sails, her blue eyes highlighted by precision use of makeup. While she wore complementary earrings and jewelry those weren't the highlight of her outfit, far from it. While her right side had covered boob and shoulder the left from below the breast and up were exposed. A decorative sixteen-pedal pastie, adorned with lines of tiny diamonds and big enough to cover two-thirds of the front of the left breast, not only covered what needed to be covered but made the officer look all the more sexy.
      "Nadia! What is that?" Lynnae asked indignantly, and just in time for Ryan and even the Governor looked as if they were about to drool.
      "Oh, this?" the questioned woman said. "It's my dress." She turned to the right in a deliberate move, making the free-range breast react predictably to the law of physics.
      "We know what it is," June said, entering the fray. "If we didn't know any better we could've sworn that you just came from The Box." Referring to an area of New Darwin where 'adult entertainment' was the main business, The Box was were one would normally find women wearing such a dress, except both breasts would be adorned with pasties. Or then again with none, for that matter.
      "Hey, that's mean, June. I've had this dress in storage ever since that undercover stint at the White Bones Casino case two years ago. This was the perfect time to wear it again."
      Now it was Amber's turn. Being so short, she stood up in her chair, hands on her hips. "Again? We all agreed to wear little black dresses tonight. You're standing out like a nipple under a wet shirt, and you're drawing unwanted attention."
      Nadia put her hand under her left boob and gave it a good shake, which did nothing to lessen the blood pressure (not to mention another kind of pressure) of most of the men looking at her. "That's what I'm counting on. Mr. Big may very well be watching us right now. Since it's proven that he could be distracted in the right circumstances I hope he forgets whatever he has planned for the Woosters and instead focuses on me."
      Lynnae's frown disappeared. "I would've felt better had you brought Smudge with you, but that dress has no way of holding him. He could sniff out Big regardless of the disguises he wears."
      All eyes at the table, especially Ryan's, were on Nadia's frontage as she was seated by Harold. June had to pinch an ogling Greg to remind him that he was sitting next to pair of lungs just as pneumatic as Nadia's. Gracefully the exotic woman unfolded her napkin and laid it across the top of her mammary mass. "We won't need Smudge tonight. If Ryan is so taken by my appearance then it goes double for Big."
      "Make that quadruple," Tobias said, subconsciously tugging at this tux collar for relief. "He's no piker when it comes to shapely women."

********

"Damn that sweet berry for harshing my groove," Big said under his breath in his hiding spot. He had a clear view of the Woosters and Nadia with most of his attention drawn to the sienna-hued woman. "I already glommed her years ago in that forest, so I know how those boobies feel in this hands. With the way she's dressed I want to rush out there, pull off that pastie and lick that chocolate brown nipple like the candy it clearly..."
      "Stay focused, Big," said Albert over the earbug. "The Woosters are the key. We're after recovering treasures that can get you thousands of women of Mrs. Junker's caliber. The show will start in fifteen minutes. I suggest you get in place now."
      "Fine," Big said resigned. "Double-check the escape route and the obstacles. It all depends on how well we suppress the feminine intuition of Lynnae and her friends."

After dinner it was time for the comedy show at the Barbie Pit, a dinner theatre style room attached to the Bush Telly. There were three comedians, with the first doing a classic on Outback cultural tropes for tourists and newcomers. As for the second it was a more raunchier performance. Once done comparing the multitude of partially-exposed breasts to cup cakes rising from too-small pans this comedian had a set of witty words focused on Nadia and her daring apparel. From 'do you have a license for that' to 'oh, it's not a bald boy but a boob' the audience was laughing, even Nadia, the gyrations of her free tit a show all its own.
      The MC stood in front of the head table while the stage underwent a transformation, a 1.5 meter tall partition rising up to form an arc over five meters long. "This last comedian is good," said Tobias, leaning over the back of Ryan's seat to speak into his ear. "Russ Dero. He's New Darwin's top prop comedian for the last two years."
      "What does he do?" Ryan asked.
      "You'll see," said Tobias mischievously.
      With an old-fashion microphone in hand the MC spoke. "Now let me welcome to our stage the act that is now celebrating its 500th consecutive sold-out performance. It's the menace to your sensibilities, good taste, and cardiovascular health. The night flier, the myth, the legend - Victory, the insult comic cave bat!"
      What popped up from behind the partition to roaring applause was an Outback cave bat puppet. Wearing sunglasses and with a genuine Saltbrush cigar attached to its left wing thumb the constructed critter bowed in reply. "Hello, peoples," said Victory, his Perth accent he affected bringing more roars of laughter. "Let me just start by saying that you suuuuuck! You suuuuuck! But not as much as our good Guv'ner Fletcher. Hey, Guv'ner, you better get to the doctor and have that hair surgery done. In bed your wife can't tell the difference between your head and your arse!" Taking a pretend draw from the cigar the puppet bat waited until the applause died down. "And, of course, you suuuuuck! You suuuuck!"
      Victory looked around the room, pointing and counting with his right wing thumb. "I hope that the animal control officer is here tonight to check licenses, because there are so many uncollared sweater puppies out there!"
      "Talk about falling out of your dresses, ladies! I know the economy is in a slump, but that doesn't mean buying dresses by the square centimeter! Perhaps if you didn't buy nanites in the first place you could wear something that won't be mistaken for a doily!"
      "Speaking of doilies, that's a nice one you have there, Mrs. Junker. I'm sure they won't miss that one at The Box!" Joke!"
      "Captain Laramie, how does it feel to have created Blue Team? Are you sure they're not the latest troop of Girl Pioneers? After all, they're young enough to be your granddaughters!"
      "Oh, is that Amber MacRoy, or one of those animatronic props you find at an adult entertainment store? I hope she came with a money back guarantee! I keed, I keed!"
      "I heard that police work leads to premature aging, so I guess by that hair color Detective Wilcox is in line for early retirement! Joke!"
      "I admire Miss Parlor. She is so big that she can play good cop, bad cop, and the mother with the bail money at the same time! I keed!"
      The jokes went on, and so did the feeling in Ryan that he heard this routine before. Despite local references and flavoring there was something in the delivery. He couldn't quite pin it when there was an abrupt change. "Now it is the time for the magic portion of my act," said Victory. "For this trick to work I will need the assistance of the lovely Hanna Wooster, 21st Century babe. Come on up."
      Ryan watched as Hanna went up on stage to the applause of the audience. The puppeteer, obviously working with video to guide his arm, planted Victory in Hanna's cleavage for a moment, the fake flying rodent saying 'it's good!' to more uproarious approval. "Now, my dear, we're going to play 'rock, paper, scissors.' If I win the best two out of three I shall perform a trick based on the winning gesture. Obviously I can't rock or scissors, so I'll have the man with the cold hand up my ass do the gestures for me." On cue a black gloved hand came into view above the partition to a wave of chuckles.
      The first one was Hanna's, paper over rock. With rapt attention the audience watched as Hanna next made scissors to Victory's rock. "Looks like I win," Victory crowed.
      "They're very sharp scissors," offered Hanna.
      "Oh, a fan of the Python. Hate to break it to you, birdy, but there's no such thing in the 25th Century."
      On the third Victory had paper over rock "Boy Howdy!" exclaimed the bat puppet. "Now for the magic trick. I'm going to make Mrs. Wooster here disappear and then reappear somewhere in the audience." Victory rubbed his left wing on Hanna's oh-so-sensual exposed lower thigh, only to get a well-deserved slap to the head. Hoots and hollering followed as the puppet rubbed his head. "Now, stand on the spot marked 'x' on the stage. That's right, honey, move what your mamma gave you."
      To some catcalls and wolf whistles Hanna slinked her way to the spot on stage. A drape was lowered from the ceiling, covering her completely. In this interlude Victory donned a magician's conical hat and grasped a magic wand with his right thumb. "Going once, going twice," intoned Victory, "move that ass someplace nice!" A flash of light and a loud boom filled the room, and those that could see past the spots before their eyes witnessed a cloud of smoke had taken the place of the drape-covered Hanna. "Wow! Talk about a blast for the past!" chortled Victory, his laughter almost immediately replaced by coughing. A very distinct, unmistakable coughing.
       One moment Ryan witness his wife disappear and the next he felt more than saw Lynnae and June literally explode from their seats, bounding for the stage. He wanted to rush after them, but his way was blocked by no less than Nadia herself. She planted Ryan on the floor, his head between her breasts as Amber, with her immense strength, turned over the heavy nu-oak table to create a barrier. Even as he worried about his wife Ryan had to admire the situation he was in, being physically protected by a tall, brown skin goddess. He felt the silky smooth fabric that covered Nadia's right breast while experiencing the sensual skin of her left breast, the pedals of the pastie only reminding him that said breast wasn't completely naked.
       "I got your wife, boobie-boy," came the taunting voice of Mr. Big over the PA system, a voice Ryan had heard centuries earlier and by Lyn and her friends frequently. "You have something I want, a little data chip. I want that data chip and all the information on it. If you don't, and if the information is gone, you'll never plant your head on her fabulous f-cups again!"

10
The puppeteer trench was still open when Lyn and June swung themselves over the partition like soldiers on an obstacle course. The recessed platform behind it had retracted to the prep room beneath the stage, but the two detectives landed on their feet like cats. By now their high-heel memory plastic slippers had transformed into floor-gripping 'runnies', meaning that unlike their ancestors they could run without resorting of the cliche of taking off their shoes. Sitting in the corner was Russ Dero, tied to a chair and gagged. Both Marshals assigned to the prep room were also tied and gagged, wearing 'ware neutralization strips on their foreheads. All of this registered in the margins of the detectives' minds, 'ware messages sent to Tobias as they ran after Big down the service corridor.
      Wetware enhanced vision allowed Lyn to see Albert carrying the unconscious form of Hanna with Big right behind them. What made the pursuit treacherous were the boxes, chairs, and other objects that fell behind Big, slowing the duo but not stopping them. At least not until they reached the lower level of the Bush Telly's kitchen. As always, the little man thought things through. Even with their adapted shoes both fell down due to a mini-lake of cooking oil on the floor, courtesy of Big. "Hope you enjoyed that slip and slide, honies," Big yelled over his shoulder. "That's what I'm going to do with Hanna!"
      For all what Big said only fueled the duo's commitment to catch him. They had one of the cooks spill the contents of a flour container onto the floor. Now without slippers they stamped their oil covered feet into the flour, negating the slippery substance and allowing them to continue the pursuit. It was a testament to their agility that they avoided the smattering of plates, silverware, and glasses scattered and broken in the wake of Big's flight from the law. Either by happenstance or accident a fall of heavy boxes, meant for Lynnae and June, instead prevented Big from following Albert. He went down another hallway, and from the smell alone the duo knew it was a linen laundry.
      It was a humid, claustrophobic room that smelled so fresh and clean that one almost felt like suffocating. Lyn went down one aisleway, shelves of folded linen on either side going up to the ceiling, with June down another. Both had drawn out custom-made tranquilizer dart guns from underneath the fold of their right breasts. The air was sullied by Big's wolf whistle. "Damn, I was wondering if you girls came armed after all!"
      "We don't need guns to be armed, but it helps," Lyn countered. "Come on out, and I promise to shoot only one butt-cheek."
      "I rather see your cheeks," Big chortled and then coughed. His voice seemed to be everywhere, leading Lyn to suspect that this room was trapped as well. In a moment she was proven right when a linen-folding robot, moving noiselessly on its six wheels, came around a corner. In each of its four hands was a spray bottle, the contents which were then shot with precision at Lyn, soaking her dress.
      "What hell!" It was June yelling from another aisle. "I got shot by a spraying robot and my dress is getting loose!"
      "Mine too!" Lyn watched with indignation as the nanoweave dress lost its grip on her body, becoming loose and saggy. It only took another moment for both tiny dresses to pool around flour-covered oiled feet. They didn't let that stop them, vaulting over the aisle-blocking robots to continue their search. Both happened to see a linen service elevator door close, catching a glimpse of a sitting Big sticking his tongue out of them. And, of course, the elevator didn't respond to either manual or 'ware overrides.
      "Fuddleducks!" June punched the wall. "It's an express-enabled service elevator too. The only thing we can do is alert Tower Security and have them physically watch the floors that elevator services." She sent a 'ware communication while taking in what remained of Lyn's clothing. "That's a nice high-cut black panty you have there, partner. At least you're not wearing one that has a cartoon bushbear on the back. And those nipple covers as well. If you're still having money problems you can earn some on the side as a undergarment model."
      Lyn blushed. The cuts on the sides of her dress were high enough to warrant the aforementioned panties. As for the nipple covers they were of the chameleon type, making areolae the same color as that of the breast, only the slight rise of the nipple under the covers proved what was underneath them. Having gotten a double eyeful of what June's dress covered Lyn had to say something. "And it's nice to see you wear a proper one for a change, instead of those thongs. Are you saving those when you and Greg get more 'intimate'?"
      "I'll let you know that this was a gift from Greg," June said impetuously. "From the money he got while resolving your tax paperwork."
      With a commanding finger Lyn pointed to June's chest. "Did he get those nipples covers too? And ones adorned with bushbears no less.You were planning something tonight, weren't...."
      "Well, that's all academic," June injected, her face blushing too. "Now that Big's gone we need to get back to the Barbie Pit. I admit I'm anxious to show off my bod to Greg, but not in front of everyone else. Why, if Ryan see us like this he'll bleed out through the nose!"
      Eying the various kinds and styles of linen in the room, Lyn had a brainstorm. "We'll do what any good girl in this circumstance would do - improvise!"

********

"What's the story, Tobias?" Captain Laramie asked over her earring comm. Having not yet been implanted with wetware she still had to resort to physical equipment.
      In the prep room Tobias was tending to one of the recovering marshals. His assistant was with the other, her smile and other obvious charms making the drowsy man happy. "There had to be something in the ice water the marshals drank just before the show, Captain. Both fell under Big's influence and had a subtle masking program uploaded to their 'ware. It allowed for audio and video surveillance once the show started, but made it appear that Dero and the agents were present instead of Big and Albert. The neutralization strips were used as a precaution to suppress emergency alarms."
      Also in the prep room was Nadia, still clad in her dress and receiving the full attention of one Russ Dero. She used her backup earring comm out of consideration for her boss. "I think I know why Big chose this method to kidnap Hanna, Captain. Straight from Mr. Dero's mouth. Over two years ago he bested Big in a poker game. Dero got the Victory act from Big as payment, basing it on a similar one back on Earth over 400 years ago on a media network call NBC."
      "NBC?" Laramie questioned. "Wasn't that a cookie company?"
      "Who knows, Captain. Dero said Big was in disguise, handed the marshals tainted drinks and then gave our favorite prop comedian a pinch to the base of shoulder, rendering him unconscious. Dero is adamant that if Big had tried bribery he would've refused up to the pain of threatened death."
      "Sounds like he has something of a guilty conscious. Nadia, inform Mr. Dero to be available for further questioning." Closing the connection, Laramie looked at a dejected-looking Ryan being tended by Felicity. Having recalled what happened in Big's Antigua retreat centuries ago he feared what Big was going to do with his precious Hanna. Given her value as the only 21st Century woman in existence Hanna safety would be a given, but that wouldn't prevent from being fondled like a mink coat by Big's immortal hands.
     Hearing a commotion from behind, Laramie saw what appeared to be two barefoot Greek goddesses approach. It turned out to be two of her detectives, Lynnae and June to be precise, clad in white linen with shoulders exposed and a yellow strap each around their waists. Their badges, originally kept in chameleon patches in the small of the back, were now around their necks, secured by thin plastic cords. On-scene police CSI were taking photos of the lovely women like nobody's business. Paul and Greg were on hand in a heartbeat, lending their tuxedo jackets to their respective women without hesitation. "Aren't you two the only things blooming in this pile," said the spry senior officer. "Report."
      Lyn stepped forward, the sway of her chest under the linen not lost on the now energized Ryan, drawing quickly on his Z-Tab. "Building Security has locked down the tower and has increased surveillance on all exits, including private aircar garages. All the floors serviced by the linen elevator used by Big are now being actively searched, as well as the floors attached to the kitchen service elevator used by Albert and Hanna."
      "Big made our pursuit very difficult," June added. The bounce of her bust was more dominating that that of Lyn's, so much so that she had to adjust her outfit to keep it from falling off. Ryan made note of that when it came time to draw the dark-haired goddess. "He had many prearranged falls to slow us down, and had a perverted surprize as a trump card, resulting in the loss of our clothes. The only thing he didn't do was to try to glom us."
      Laramie waved June off. "No need to explain further. I have come to expect any close encounter with Big will result in the loss of clothing. Given the size of the tower and surveillance involved its likely Big is still here, not to mention that he has three women with him already. He could be in one of the luxury penthouse or even a converted storage room. You two will research all rentals and leases of Victoria Tower space for the last year."
      "Yes, ma'am," said Lyn. "As much as we like to dress as a pair of lovely angels, could we first get a proper change of clothes?"
     Laramie grinned. "Very well. Use one of the stores here in the tower, but be discreet. It takes only one photo to go from lovely angels to a 'dirty pair' of cops."

********

Eyes fluttering, Hanna awoke from the drug-induced sleep. Though lights were dim she could tell she was in a large, well furnished room. "Where am I?" she said to herself, knowing it was cliche to do so. She laid back down on the sinfully rich sofa, looking up at the ceiling.
      The lights went up to full, and a strange face appeared over hers. "Well you're right here!"
      Hanna shrieked, bolting upwards from the shock of seeing what appeared to be someone's idea of an old man's face. Further temblors of nausea followed when she saw that face attached to a small man's body swathed in a housecoat. The forearms and shins were exposed, old and agespotted, a perfect fit for the face. Perhaps he fancied himself like Hugh Hefner, but Hanna didn't want to know if the body underneath matched the wrinkled prune that was attached to the top. "Get away from me, you creep! What gives you the right to kidnap me!"
      Picking up a glass of wine and a lit cigar the pint-sized man advanced on Hanna like a cat would to a toy bird. "As the premiere lord of crime I have to live up to my reputation, deary. I'm Mr. Big, and you'll be my guest until your hubby coughs up the information I need."
      Hanna picked up throw pillow from the sofa and used it against Big, dodging the missile without spilling his drink. "Oh, God are you hideous! Ryan wasn't lying, and I thought his drawings of you were embellished!"
      "So he drew me, eh? Perhaps he does have some talent other than drawing pneumatic women after all." Big finished his drink and took a long draw from the cigar, exhaling like a 19th century smokestack. "As much as I like to chat with you, deary, I need you to get your rest. 6 a.m. tomorrow will be the start of a very important day for you." He snapped his fingers, the sound akin to pieces of lumber being broken in half, and out came three women from a side room. "Girls, take Hanna and get her ready for bed. Lights out is at 11 p.m."
      "Aww, that soon, Biggie?" said one of the trio, a woman with skin that was two shades darker than Nadia's. "I wanted to watch more of that show that had puppet robots making fun of movies."
      "Tomorrow, Jolie, after breakfast. Now hurry up, you girls have only an hour."
      The trio surrounded Hanna, absolutely happy to be in the same room with a man that looked like a rehydrated midget mummy. "Oh, what a nice dress," cooed the brunette. "The only way I can wear something like that is if it came in two parts."
      "Make that three parts and a lot of paste," said the blonde. She wrapped an arm around Hanna's waist like she was her best friend. "C'mon, honey, let's slip you into something nice."
      Hanna had been informed by Lyn and June on how Big liked his women, well, 'big' in the chest. Moreover, Ryan had told her about his time under the influence of Big while on Antigua, using a stylus that had a magic Voodoo priest finger bone in it to endow women with huge honkers. He never told her how big he made the Antigua women other than Nancy and Jordan, but looking at the trio made her suspect the size was right up Ryan's alley. All three had busts that were larger than Lynnae's, with the smallest easily as big as June's. The other two were considerably larger and would give even the silicone queens of old tough competition. She also knew from Lyn that Big doesn't go for 'falsies' and always went for natural boob meat. Given the bubbly attitude of the trio Hanna knew that breasts comparisons, complete with locker room glomming and fondling, was going to happen tonight. Resigned, she was guided to the bedrooms, but not before getting a slap to the butt from Big in passing.
      Albert, waiting out of sight, entered the living room just as the girls left. "Big, all security measures are in place. It will take days for the police to find us with a physical search."
      "Excellent. Plenty of time for what I have planned. Are the supplies for tomorrow night's party ready?"
      "Yes, Big. Including those for Mrs. Wooster."
      "Good. With the breakfast I have planned she'll have no choice but indulge herself."

11
It was late when the detectives assembled back at Central, Room 405. It was just a week ago they were promoted to detective, and only earlier this day was the room finally fitted out with desks, chairs and other accouterments. However, it was Lyn that added the first personal touch, a reproduction of an ancient poster of a movie called Bullitt hung on a wall. Now in a spare set of casual clothes she stood in front of that poster, hand on what would eventually be her desk. "With all the redundant surveillance at Victoria Tower the only way Big can make his escape is with that Supercar of his. We need to know where in the tower he's holding Hanna."
      Still in his tux, Ryan sat like a student that knew he failed a test. He zest for drawing having died as worry for Hanna continued to build. "Won't he be calling on the when and were to turn over the data? With all your technical whiz-bang at your disposal...."
      "It doesn't work that way, not with Big," said Tobias, tie loose and collar unbuttoned. "He'll contact you in a manner that's untraceable and unconventional. It will end up having you going to him. Even if we have surveillance on you the whole time at some point you'll disappear from view. The case histories go way back on this sort of thing, so this is a given."
      "If only we had Dan," said Paul, also still in his tux, standing next to a water dispenser. "He could've used his shamanic talent to locate Hanna, but he's out of contact in the Frostpine Forest in southern Sydney."
      June, now wearing faded jeans and a generous sweatshirt, rose from her desk. "Above all, Big likes luxury. He wouldn't be in some converted storeroom in the middle of the tower. No, he'll be in a suite at or above the 480th floor. We have just to think like him, put ourselves in his shoes..."
      "No need to get disgusting," said Nadia. Her body was still clad in her dress, but it was in turn covered by her long but fashionable coat. "We now got a lead." She tapped her left earring. "Just got a call from Patty. She and Felicity chatted it up with Russ Dero and he remembered something. He was in Big's apartment two years ago for his Victory puppet training. Russ distinctly remembered a suite that had a master bath and three smaller ones, each of which was attached to a bedroom."
      "That'll make our search easier." Lyn said, her eyes straight ahead as she conducted a fresh 'ware search of Victoria Tower's database. June joined in too, sitting back down and resting her feminine-filled tee on her desk.
      While he waited Ryan turned to Paul. "I don't know what data Big is talking about. After that Antigua business I had the original storage in my Z-Tab replaced and destroyed. I didn't want any record of what I did to those women with that voodoo finger come back to haunt me. There was that one storage card I kept, but that was clean as far as I could determine."
      "Big hidden the file on that portion of the card's memory that couldn't be erased," Paul said, removing his tux jacket. "Mr. Brownstone found and decrypted it. Right now it's important for Big to believe we found only those files on the card one would expect to find, and not the one he wants."
      Ryan looked genuinely sour. "He won't do anything... stupid with Hanna, would he?"
    "I'll be honest, Ryan. Big will grope and paw Hanna like a horny college freshman, but he won't go beyond that since she's one-of-a-kind. In other words, he doesn't want to break the merchandise."
      "Well, that was as blunt as a brick to the face, but I'm not surprized. I've seen what Big considers to be 'pawing' back on Antigua, and so help me if I get my hands on him...."
      "We narrowed down the search considerably," said Lyn, eyes now in clear focus. "With further details from Mr. Dero we now have 120 suites that fit the profile. June is working on the room service histories, and I'm sure we'll narrow it down even further by morning."
      Ryan looked better, but only a little. "I hope Hanna isn't the worst of wear by then."
      There was a knock at the door, followed by an officer entering the room. "Detectives," said the uniformed woman, "I brought some coffee and doughnuts from the breakroom downstairs, in case you need it tonight."
      "Thank you, Darlene," said June, taking the load out of the woman's hands. "How are the kids?"
      "Excellent. Danny got all A's this semester and Brenda will be performing in the New Year's Eve concert at the Straw Bowl Arena. Oh, is that Mr. Wooster? Can I get his autograph?"
     "Certainly," said the artist. Paul handed over a sheet of paper and pen, upon which Ryan placed his signature. Darlene gladly accepted it, attributing the glazed look in the man's eyes to her beautiful face. Only when she left did Ryan put on his sunnies, wiping sweat from his brow. "Umm.... wow. So, since she's that big..."
      Nadia smiled. "Well, yes and no, Ryan. Darlene went undercover as an Angelican woman to get the goods on an undergarment manufacturer suspected of being in cahoots with Mr. Big. She volunteered to have nanites enlarge her breasts instead of using plastiskin falsies. She'll be back down to normal size in about two months."
      "Well, for the moment I saw her before my eyes went out, I must say the uniform looked.... well-tailored for her build."
      Lyn cracked a smile. "You should've seen me and June when we had to be similarly 'built-up' for an undercover assignment. We had to beat back the boys with cattle prods!"

********

The first thing Hanna experienced in the morning was a familiar sensation of a dachshund giving her kisses to the chin and cheeks. For a moment she thought last night was a dream, everything after the magic trick just her imagination acting up after eating a sinfully delightful Outback steak. But the truth was rude, for the doxie wasn't Smudge but another, and after holding up the brown-coated affectionate critter she saw the name 'Pumpkin' written on the collar. It was also then she realized she had slept while only wearing a panty, her dismay reinforced when Carolyn, Ninon and Jolie entered her room, each one topless and pneumatic as ever.
      "Wake up, girlfriend," said Carolyn. "Time to get your shower and dressed for the day. Albert is cooking breakfast and we mustn't keep him waiting."
      "I suppose if I refuse you'll drag me to the bath, and hopefully not drown under those airbags you three are carrying."
      The trio giggled. "You're so funny, just like at bedtime," said Ninon. With that the blonde guided Hanna not to the small, individual bathrooms that the three luxury 'guest' rooms each had but to the master bath. Together all four women made use of the huge shower, sonic drying stalls and a well-stocked makeup hutch. They tended to Hanna like a princess, complementing the fine hair and skin for one that came from the 21st Century. Once done they went to the dining area and sat around a huge table with Hanna taking pride of place at its head. Instead of changing into normal clothes all four wore panties and huge bedshirts that reached down to their knees. For the three very endowed women the bedshirts had New Darwin sport team logos. Hanna had one adorned with the Duke University Lacrosse team logo, circa 2006. It felt like a bad joke that was only mitigated when Pumpkin jumped into Hanna's lap. With front paws on the table and tongue hanging out the rotund miniature dachshund was ready for some food.
      A tall, distinguished mature looking man, wearing a cooking apron, entered the room. With spatula in hand the man waved the kitchen implement at the dog. "Pumpkin, you're not allowed at the table. Get down, down girl."
      The dog ignored the man, but then started to growl for some reason. In a moment it became clear for at the other end of the table the Victory bat puppet appeared, complete with sunglasses and cigar. "For those that don't know the history," said the bat, same voice and accent as last night, "let me just say that Duke suuuuucks! Duke suuuuucks!"
     "Good morning... Big," said Hanna scornfully. "There's no need to use that crude bat puppet. You can pretend to be a midget Hugh Hefner clone to your heart's content."
      "Why thank you, dear." Quite smug with himself Big stood up and strolled over to Hanna. Then, with his Victory voice, he held the puppet up to Hanna's face. "So, babe, how did you like the accommodations? Naughty Ninon gave up her room for you, and had to spend the night in my palatial cave."
      "It was sinfully decadent, but nowhere near as sinful as you, you worn out piece of shriveled shoeleather."
      "Is that the way to treat your host, honey melons? Biggy does nothing halfway, you know." Big planted the bat right on Hanna's chest, making the line of cleavage form on the bedshirt. "I can tell your boobies are softer thanks to the expensive bodywash you used in the bath. They'll make Big's headrest all the more fun."
      Hanna, despite a renewed sense of nausea and disgust, put her hand on Big's face and pushed him way. "Get your stinkin breath and that crude bat outta my face! I took self-defense classes, and I brought down men bigger and less obnoxious than you."
      "Oh, is that so?" Big said in his normal voice. "I'll let you have a chance to prove that after breakfast. We'll make room in the living area to have an impromptu sparing contest." Tossing the bat puppet onto a nearby chair, Big held out his hands to Pumpkin. "Okay, my sweetums, you can't be at the table while people are eating." To his suprize the little rotund dog growled and snapped, as if Pumpkin didn't recognize her master. "Fine, you'll be leaving that lap soon enough anyway when I get some... Snuffles doggie treats!" Upon hearing that the dachshund leapt out of Hanna's lap and into Big's waiting arms, swarming up like a rat escaping a fire so as to plant doggies kisses on Big's face. Had it been anyone else Hanna would be amused, but instead she found the sight disturbing.
      "Did you slather your face with bacon grease to get Pumpkin to act like that?"
      "Rude! Especially since I had Albert cook up one of the best breakfast items of the 21st Century - the Breakfast Burrito! Albert, serve the ladies, will you?"
      "At once, Big," said Albert, retreating to the kitchen and then returning with a platter of 12 of the aforementioned burritos. Everyone got two with Hanna being served first.
      Big grinned. "Go ahead, dive into that tucker. Otherwise you'll be insulting Albert, and he's such a good chef."
      "Okay, I will, but only because he's far more good looking than you." With that Hanna took a bite from one of her burritos. From that moment she felt that the ovens of Hell were operating in her mouth. "Fuck! It's so hot!!" she labored to say.
      "Again with the language," Big chided. "My dear, you just experienced the end product of centuries of refining the Bhut Jolokia, the hottest pepper in history. Each pepper is guaranteed to be at least 1,200,000 Scoville heat units."
      Her face flushed red, Hanna felt like belching fire at that moment. "Shut up and give me some water!"
      Big produced an open bottle that Hanna took immediately, not even noticing that the label said 'Bubbles.' She chugged it down, finding that it didn't even come close to squelching the sensation of hellfire, so she took the next bottle Big offered, then another, and another...
      After the fifth bottle a great pressure filled Hanna's chest, prompting the woman to look down. She wanted to disbelieve what her eyes and nerves were telling her, but as sure as the pepper-spawned fire in the mouth kept raging her breasts were undeniably filling out bigger and bigger. No longer f-cups, the ladybumps were as large as Lynnae's, putting more definition into the bedshirt with each passing moment. It felt like the time Ryan played in the bath, pulling on Hanna's boobs like fruits from a tree. Only this time the feeling was ten times as great and strangely pleasurable at the same time.
     "Biggy, you lied," sniffled Jolie. "You said you had no more Bubbles left." Carolyn and Ninon agreed, pouting also.
      While keeping his eyes on Hanna's expanding prizes Big responded to Jolie's accusation. "Sorry, girls. I was saving them for our guest here. But I tell you what - any of the bottles left over I'll have you three drink. But I'm gonna divvy them up so that you three come as close to the same size as possible."
      "Oh, thank you, Biggy," gushed Ninon. "That'll be a great late Christmas present!"
      Hanna couldn't help herself. The effects of the peppers still haven't subsided, and this drink Big kept handing her was so addictive. Right now she guessed she was sporting a pair that rivaled June's, but another hot flash and growth spurt put that in the past tense. The bedshirt was filling out more, breasts underneath surging forward and outward. She subconsciously played her left hand on the associated fabric-covered tit while chugging down another bottle of Bubbles. In a way it reminded her of Spring Break 2004, the same one where she meet Ryan for the first time. Aside from the obvious ogling and sloppy drunk boob-grabs that followed they made a connection that week that would eventually lead to marriage. Right now, despite the fact she was now bigger than most silicone queens centuries ago, she knew Ryan, in a perverse way, would enjoy watching his woman becoming a real-life version of one of his sketches.
      "Oh, call Lakehurst Naval Air Station," Big giggled, even though the other girls didn't get the reference. "The big ones are coming in!"
      Hanna now knew why Big had her wear such a huge bedshirt. She looked and felt bigger than the Angelican woman she saw at the museum. Size alone the breasts filled her lap completely, unlike having a set of wet bags of cement spilling over an overloaded wheelbarrow. Only now did the burning pepper hell start to die down, but the craving for Bubbles continued and Big kept producing bottle after bottle. The perverted little man got up and snapped his fingers, bringing Albert to Hanna's side. "As much as I like to see you grow, sugar bumps," chortled the crime lord, "you'll have to finish the job in the living room. Once you're done you can show me how you'll take take me down with your self-defense skills."
      "I'll crush the breath out of you, pervert!" Hanna said, subconsciously regretting that some of the Bubbles drink dribbled out of the corner of her mouth as she talked inbetween swigs of the unnaturally wonderful drink.
      "Sorry, honey. That's happened to me so many times that I've developed a resistance to such efforts." With that Big and Albert lifted and guided Hanna a large open spot in the living room, each step seeming adding another inch of bust to the one-of-a-kind blond beauty. If Ryan saw her now, even with her breasts covered, he would run the risk of being blinded for life.

12
"What a circus," said Captain Laramie, peering out the window of her office at the distant news hovers orbiting Victoria Tower, looking like so many fruit flies. The plaspaper on her desk was a hardcopy of the morning edition of the New Darwin Sun. In bold print the paper proclaimed 'Blue Christmas For Woosters - Big Bags Bodacious Babe at Barbie Pit.' Known to be in the back pocket of Big, the paper painted the police in a most unflattering manner and called the efforts of the police to catch him 'Keystone Cops' comedy. The officers involved were left unnamed, a smart move to forestall any slander lawsuits. "Mr. Big has a plan to get Ryan to the Tower without being seen by us or the media. We have to be just as clever to find Big's suite without drawing attention as well."
      Standing in the office was Lynnae and June, wearing conservative jackets, blouses and knee-length skirts. Even so their feminine curves and swells still made an impression pass the fabric. "Captain, we're now down to 14 suites, all of them between the 480th and 484th floors. So far we've done only a passive investigation of the suites as an active one will tip off Big. Paul and Nadia are using a special method to find the suite we're after. Hopefully that will happen in the next two hours."
      "Will you make your move when that happens?" It was Ryan, sitting in a chair next to Laramie's desk. In his hands was the replica Z-Tab. He tapped the screen harshly. "I hate to jump through hoops to Big's tune."
      "I'm afraid we'll have to humor him, Ryan," said the Captain. "Big has followed through on his threats in the past, both physical and... political. Let's just say some heads, both public and private, will roll if we don't go along. We'll act once we're confident of safely rescuing Hanna."
      "Big does love his blackmail," June commented. "Ryan, it's best you start now. You'll get an involuntary grand tour of the city, courtesy of Big."
      "Won't you be able to track me?"
      Lyn sighed. "Not even if we wanted to. He'll leave you instructions along whatever route he has planned for you. You can at least expect three changes of clothing and plastiskin face masks. Even if we implant you with trackers Big will have clothes that contain anti-tracking technology. As for your Z-Tab, I won't be suprized if he restricted its ethersphere connection so only messages from him could be received."
       Ryan shrugged his shoulders, standing up. "Wish me luck. I hope you'll come through like the cavalry."
       Laramie shook Ryan's hand. "You'll have more than luck, Ryan. A quartet of guardian angels will be there for you."

********

In one of Victoria Tower's floors devoted to room service, recycling, and facilities maintenance two detectives waited by an elevator. With them was the tower's security chief, Langstrom. Already stung by the kidnapping and having the dubious honor of having Big residing in the tower Langstrom was eager to help Paul and Nadia. The first of that morning's linen carts, motorized bins with attending room service worker, came off the service lift. "What are we looking for, detectives?" said Langstorm.
      "Definite signs of Mr. Big, Albert, and his three, correction, four female guests," said Paul as he drew out a bathroom towel from a cart, holding it like a dead rat by its tail.
      "So you're going to test the towels? Good luck, Mr. Jarvis. If this Big character is as clever as the news makes him out to be then we're bound to have a harvest of red herrings. We pick up used towels and such out of tradition for the luxury suite residents. Each suite and apartment comes with its own linen processing unit."
      Nadia simply smiled. "Big can make mistakes, especially when he leaves 'women work' to his current harem of lovelies. We have a foolproof way to find traces of his presence." Her smile became joyous when her husband Harold arrived, and tucked under his arm was Smudge. That didn't last long as once the little dog saw Nadia he squirmed like a mud devil, only stopping once Harold handed him over. Only after planting several licks on Nadia's chin did Smudge calm down, content to be held in his mistress' arms. "Okay, lets start."
      One by one Paul pulled out the towels which Smudge sniffed with diligence. It wasn't until the fourth cart that Smudge reacted. He whined and fidgeted, tail wagging as the hand towel was laid out on a nearby table. Harold produced a minicomp from his coat pocket and scanned the towel. "We got it," said the marshal, patting Smudge on the head. "We have Hanna's DNA well as Big's pet dachshund. Since this was at the very bottom of the cart, we'll know which suite it came from."
      "Suite 10483," Langstrom said proudly, only then to frown. "You're not going to perform a SWAT raid like the last time? Thanks to some wild shooting that broke open a case of Mountain White we had to decontaminate an entire floor."
      "That won't happen this time, Mr. Langstrom," said Nadia, stroking Smudge's back that elicited a low-pitched hum of approval from the happy critter. "Big's vice is women, not drugs. We're going to use that against him."

********

The morning passed to early afternoon. Aside from the care tended to her by Big's trio of topheavy girls Hanna only had her thoughts to keep her company. That and Pumpkin, a rotund miniature doxie that took residence on her massive left tit, sleeping contently. From the way Hanna was positioned in the living area one would think she was an artwork centerpiece the brought the whole suite together. Her back was to the panoramic windows that looked out onto the city. To either side and the front were three curved couches, forming an arc. A large bar lined the back wall, complete with six stools. Rich, dark wood paneling with gold trim gave the vibe of a rich outdoorsman, especially with the lineup of mounted heads above the bar. With curious eyes she noted a tiger, bear, lion, antelope, an Outback bushbear and a few others she couldn't recognize. Most likely alien wildlife from other planets.
      Hanna was still coming to grips on just how big her breasts were, and wondering how the bedshirt was able to stretch to cover most of it. Only the bottom quarter of each breast was exposed, resting on carpeting as soft and pleasing as silk. She couldn't reach the front of her mammical wonders, and every attempt to do so resulted in her arms disappearing into her fabric-covered funbags. Then there was another matter, one concerning biology...
      "Hello, Missy," cackled Big as he waltzed into the room, drink in one hand and a file pad in the other. "I've been keeping tabs on your hubby. Pretty soon he'll lose those police goons for good."
     "You'll lose your renter's deposit if I don't get to the bathroom soon," Hanna seethed. "You made me drink all those bottles, no thanks to the addictive taste and hot peppers." Even Pumpkin joined in, making a low volume growl directed at Big.
      Big fetched a Snuffle doggie treat from his house coat pocket and tossed it towards Hanna's left tit. Pumpkin jumped up and caught it, landing with enough force to make the mammary mass jiggle like chilled gelatin. The now content dog chewed the treat in a rather noise manner. "It never fails that simple treats can change the temper of bitches."
      "Then you're not referring to me," Hanna said snidely. "I can't say the same for your girls." She spared a look as Big's trio entered the room. Two of them wore drive-in waitress outfits, complete with old-fashion roller skates, one would expect from 1950's era of the USA. For the third she wore a bartender outfit. All shared a bust size that would be fit for an Angelican woman. She witnessed earlier how the girls divvied up the remaining bottles of something called Bubbles amongst themselves and drank. Their already considerable busts got even bigger, only stopping once Big measured all three so that they shared the same 'bust-to-height' ratio of 1. "How are they able to walk, much less rollerskate?"
      Big handed his empty glass to the one called Carolyn and planted the free hand on Hanna's fabric-covered right nipple, thankful that the Bubbles drink didn't make them bigger as well, and tweaked it like it was an old-fashion rocker switch. "While Bubbles is a magic drink, lassie, they don't make the boobies lighter. You'll need nanites and several weeks, or even months for even bigger girls, for that to work. So they have anti-grav cloth in their bras, powered by receptors in their clothes that pick up directed beams of energy. Without that, they'll be sharing the floor with you."
      "If you keep playing my nipple like that then that's not the only thing they'll be sharing the floor with," Hanna grated. "Get me to a toilet... Now!"
      "Alright, alright! Don't get all... pissy!" Big sniggered, using his Victory voice. "I keed, I keed!" He then used a small remote fished from another pocket, pressing a button. Hanna felt herself moving to the left while the arc of couches turned to her right. She stopped once her ultra-buxom massed faced the wall opposite of the dining area. Big pressed another button, and the wall parted, revealing a master bedroom and the huge bath. The normal door was the far left, the one Hanna used last night, and it was just big enough to let an Angelican-sized woman through. She looked down at her expanse, then reluctantly to Big. Her wit was still with her. "I assume there's a reason for that moving wall, other than to facilitate the filming of porno films?"
      "Oh, you wound me, Mrs. Wooster. You're not the first mega-buxom woman I've entertained. You see, this suite use to be owned by a Cloud 9 franchise owner, and one of his pillow women doubled as his executive secretary. She he modified this suite to facilitate her needs."
      Hanna eyed the opened portion of wall again, eyebrows twitching. "Ummm... what and how big is a 'pillow woman'?"
      Big got up to Hanna and leaned over her left tit, scooping up Pumpkin while caressing the boobflesh under the taunt fabric with his forearms. "A pillow woman, deary, as any 13-year-old boy will tell you, has a massive pair of ta-tas with which to offer a sweet, soft comforting place for a man to sleep between overnight. Typically they're twice as big as you."
      "Twice as big?" A mix of concern and morbid fascination filled her face. "How big am I?"
      "One hundred and fifty-two inches, mighty melons! You can thank all the Bubbles you drank to quench the peppers. Typically each bottle adds two inches of bust, but with drinking so many one after another the effect multiplied like so many jackalopes!"
       Before Hanna could protest such unfairness to God she felt herself being lifted off the floor, high enough so that even her prodigious norks no longer felt the sensual carpeting below. "That's a tractor beam and a localized anti-grav field, missy," Big chuckled. You'll be whisked to that toilet that seems to be all by its lonesome in the master bath." He snapped his fingers. "Girls, get Hanna into her outfit, if you can call it that, after she's done her business. But not before you give her the lotion treatment. I want to have my guests tonight go away thinking they've been treated to the bosom of Hera herself!"

13
There was no doubt in Ryan's mind now that New Darwin was a huge city. From multi-block spanning structures to humble street-level bars he felt that he was experiencing four cities in one. With Big's directions appearing on the replica Z-Tab he was sent into parts of the city where electronic dead zones and thick crowds aided in the donning of no less than five changes of disguises. He felt he was part of an espionage operation, with as many unseen Big associates as there were of law enforcement. In more than a handful of instances delivery vans, staged traffic incidents, and random people that mobbed what had to be police watchers helped in eluding official surveillance. The instructions didn't allow him to stand still for lunch, eating on the go from whatever street food vendors that happened along the way.
      Victoria Tower dominated the city skyline, and it was in the mid-afternoon shadow of that megabuilding that Ryan went down a subway entrance. With the datacard that came as part of his current disguise he swiped it at the turnstile and waited on the platform. Within a minute a small subway car came down the track. It was odd looking, circular with only four hand grips spaced equally around the interior. Once inside the doors closed and the car speed down the mag-lev track, Ryan hanging onto a hand grip for a sense of security. The tunnel went dark with only the safety glowstrips providing feeble light. After a few minutes, which began with a brief sensation of acceleration upwards, the car stopped and the doors opened into a rather large bedroom. Ryan walked around the room, much in awe of its luxurious setting as well as wondering what was going to happen next.
      The Z-Tab beeped, informing Ryan that a new message was received. He read it, and, reluctantly following the instructions, used the plastiskin dissolvent to remove the facemask, take a shower in the huge master bath, and wear the clothes laid on a bed big enough to hold a harem of hotties. Once done the final set of instructions told him to wait until called for, a plate fresh fruits and vegetables and a carafe of water on a serving cart to qwell any pangs of hunger. Ryan took a slice of cucumber and chewed it like a potato chip. He was anxious to get this over with, and had no time for Big's little games.

********

Unfortunately for Ryan that night Big was in no hurry to see him now that he had him exactly where he wanted. There was the matter of entertaining guests first. Four New Darwin businessmen were tapped by Big to become junior partners of BCCI - Big Crime Cabal Incorporated. To become full partners required the vote of the BCCI council after a four-year probation period, and having garnered sufficient wealth within those four years. A shrewd judge of character, Big only chose those that had the best conditions and chances to become one of his associates.
      With Carolyn bartending and Ninon and Jolie rollerstaking to and fro, serving drinks and food, the living area resembled a private executive party. The only difference between this and a similar party held on Cloud 9 was that three of the women were mind-controlled by Big and the fourth was held against her will. Hanna was back to her spot on the carpet, now resting on a memory plastic recliner that made her feel she was between two ocean swells made of breast flesh. Earlier the girl trio gave her a bath, styled her hair, and clothed her in genie outfit that was the same as worn by Barbara Eden of I Dream of Jeannie. Hanna mentioned as much as the girls worked the clothes on her in the grip of the tractor beams, giggling at her wealth of 'ancient knowledge.' The outfit was the same except for two major differences. First of these was that the abbreviated vest could never hope to stretch across her impossible bust. As for the second there were metallic nipple caps in lieu of a halter top. When she asked Big why he went through the bother of having her dressed up in such a manner when most of her clothes were out of sight the little man laughed. He told her that, while in Antigua, Ryan drew a picture of her in a genie outfit. Tonight he wanted Ryan to see his artwork in the flesh, even though most of it was breasts.
      The four businessmen were on the arc couches, looking at that part of the New Darwin night that wasn't obscured by Hanna's mighty twins as well as the woman herself as they sipped ancient Earth wine. Albert was in the kitchen, preparing the main meal as well as keeping Pumpkin out of mischief. This had to be done so that Big, esconsced in Hanna's cleavage, could use the Victory puppet without interruption. Raised far enough above the fleshy valley to be seen by the exclusive audience the crude bat puppet spoke courtesy of Big's talented voice. "Okay, peoples, it's now time to dish out your junior BCCI codenames. Now, after careful deliberation I chose those names that best suit you, based on the businesses you're in." The puppet, with sunnies and stogie, looked a a list that was laid out on Hanna's right tit. "Okay, starting from my left, we have the Freeway Freak. With the construction unions at your beck and call you can bilk the city out of money faster than a talking a girl out of her panties on prom night!" The ensuing laughter was enough for Hanna to cover her ears.
     "Next we have Disco Crisco. Work those young musicians like the instruments they play, Disco, and your bottom line will be fatter than that of your wife! I keed, I keed!" Big moved his arm, having it look like Victory was consulting his list while the men laughed again. For Hanna it felt like having an irritating grain of sand between the toes. For a fossil like Big he sure did have some hair on his arms. "Boom Blastpants, your line of fashion clothing undercuts the competition. It also exposes the modesty of girls that buy it so much that underwear became the new 'outerwear!' Joke!
      "Now for Dr. Kool. Once you've gained the lion's share of the medical nanite market you'll be surrounded by secretaries and executive assistants just as pneumatic as my girls here and even afford weekly visits to Cloud 9. Well, tonight you and your fellow junior partners will get a taste of the Cloud 9 experience. Hanna may not be as big as a pillow woman, but her breasts are grade-A 21st Century stock, enlarged for your pleasure."
      Hanna's face heated up. "You... You're going to have those guys get between my boobs like it was for a fraternity initiation? Is that why you made me so huge?"
      "I sure did, honey melons." It was Big's voice now, the bat puppet pulled off by his other hand and stuffed into a pocket of his housecoat. He turned around and raised himself up out of the cleavage like a leviathan from the deep, looking down at Hanna's indignant face. "Don't worry. It's not like what they do for Skull and Crossbones. They'll just rest between those boobs for a few minutes and forever enjoy their uniqueness. But, before that, you'll get a reunion." He turned, making Hanna cover her eyes so as not to witness Big's backside, even though it was covered. "Ninon, Jolie, get Ryan in here. Make sure he wears the midnight goggles. I don't want him to see yet."
      "So, you're getting that file you blabbered about earlier," Hanna jabbed, wishing she had real genie powers to go with her outfit. "It's not like you're obscenely rich to being with, you toad."
      "Well, they know what they say, girlie," Big giggled. "Wealth can cover a multitude of sins. Therefore, I need as much wealth I can get my hands on! With the prices I can fetch in private actions from the stuff I stashed away on Earth I can commit many, many more sins!"
      Hanna felt Big leaving the confines of her cleavage, prompting her to open her eyes for confirmation. With arms outstretched she flatten down as much bust as possible to improve her forward view. The two rollerskating girls entered the master bedroom and brought out Ryan a moment later, his eyes covered in goggles fit for a welder. With one on either side of Ryan the girls' busts practically obscured Ryan's chest. Hanna didn't have to imagine what Ryan was experiencing.
      Big tied up his housecoat and stepped into his slippers, walking up to the breast-besieged man. "Okay, boy, I'll take that now." He took the replica Z-Tab from Ryan's hand, checking that it had the memory card, ejecting and eying it like a diamond. He put the object of his quest in his pocket, giving the Z-Tab to Carolyn and in turn getting two bottles. A pair of all-too familiar bottles for Hanna's peace of mind. The smile he flashed at Hanna didn't help matters one bit. "Ninon, Jolie, do the honors."
     Together the pneumatic girls dressed as 50's waitresses coaxed Ryan forward until he made contact with Hanna's breasts. "Now, get down, boy," Big ordered. "Put that head of yours on Hanna's chest." Going on his knees, Ryan felt the girls pushing him forward until his face made contact with what felt to him as soft, firm pillows.
      "I remember this feeling," Ryan gushed, his hands moving of their own accord despite himself, as he moved himself deeper into the cleavage and closer to his wife's face. "It's just like when Nancy Wilcox offered her bosom to banish my boobie blindness."
      Hanna leaned forward, planting a kiss on the top of her husband's head. "I'm bigger than Nancy was, more than twice as much as she described it way back when," she admitted. "I would rather have been with you running around the city than trapped in this tomb with a midget mummy."
      Big shook his head. "Again with the dispersions, girlie. Well, prepare for some fine-tuning!" He opened one bottle, holding it out like a magical talisman. "You will drink this and the other one. Or else I will remove Ryan's goggles. As big as you are the effect on Ryan's sight might be... permanent."
      Hanna fought the craving that clawed her tongue and tickled the roof of her mouth. She kept that gremlin at bay long enough to talk. "I suppose you could always inject me with the stuff or force-feed me another hot pepper burrito. I'll drink them, but only my body will enjoy the experience."
      "That's all I ask! Okay, junior partners, gather round and plant your hands on the best breast real estate this side of Cloud 9. You'll get to see and feel breast growth first hand!"
      From Big's perspective it was like watching a group of kids at a petting farm, putting their hands on a placid beast. From Hanna's perspective it was like having a horde of boob-obsessed frat boys patting her ta-tas like drum-tight bongos. The quartet hooted when Big handed over the first bottle, then chanted 'chug it, chug it' like a barroom chorus. The craving for Bubbles took over once she smelled the all-so-captivating aroma wafting from the open top, and she downed it like a veteran mug pounder from Milwaukee. To her embarrassment she grabbed the second one out of Big's hand and took off the cap in a quick jerk, slamming down the soft drink. She was amazed and ashamed at the speed she polished off the drinks, and that she subconsciously ensured that not one drop dribbled past her lips.
      Ryan swore he was on an air mattress being blown up, Hanna's boobs pressing warmly into his face. His hands were warm too, as if there was rising pizza dough underneath his fingers. The four men felt and saw their pressing palms being pushed out by the expansion. Hanna's expanding skin was so impressionable that the mens' palm prints remained for several moments once they pulled back, her skin acting very much like memory plastic asserting itself in removing a dent. "Whoa, Nelly! Easily another ten inches, if not twelve," Big proclaimed, patting the now restive mammaries. "There must've been some unused Bubbles in your system to facilitate all that growth."
      "No thanks to you," Hanna snapped. "You had your fun blowing me up like balloons and threatening Ryan with permanent blindness. Now that you got your file, what are you going to do us?"
      "Oh, the file! Thanks for reminding me! Carolyn, get me the original Z-Tab." While he waited Big ejected the memory card again while his lecherous eyes played over the bosomy expanse that was Hanna. He went to her side, looking down. The woman had her arms covering Ryan's back, a symbolic act of protection. "Well, for sure I'll keep you for the night. If it turns out to be fun, I just might had you two stored in a stasis field and sold at an exclusive private auction! Imagine, for decades and centuries to come, being part of a private collection and then sold at the highest bidder. Why, you'll become the most valuable artifacts in the universe!"
     That comment made Ryan turn around in Hanna's melon valley, his goggled head now residing under her chin, his disdain for Big shared by his beloved. "Don't be shining any pennies yet, you bastard. You'll come to regret crossing paths with us."
      "Well, I regret nothing!" At that Big reached down and pulled the goggles off of Ryan, tossing them aside. "That's right, boy, keep those peepers shut!" the criminal mastermind taunted. "Don't look at the Ark, Marion!"
      Before Hanna could put Big to task Albert entered the room, still wearing a cooking apron over his formal suit. "The escorts have arrived, Big." Without preamble he ushered in four attractive women in expensive evening dresses. Had Ryan opened his eyes he would've seen one petite woman, two taller women and one even taller woman, adorned with jewelry, makeup and perfume that sweetly whispered sexuality instead of shouting. They lined up by height, with the four junior BCCI men deciding their individual choices from the quartet.
      "Everybody's gonna get some tonight, but I'm having double," Big giggled, eying Carolyn and Ninon lustfully. He took the original Z-Tab Carolyn fetched for him and popped in the memory chip. He brought up the file that held the locations and inventory of his hidden Earth treasures. He had the short escort come to him, wrapping his arm around her waist like a naughty octopus. "Hey, Bonnie Sue, how does it feel to be in the presence of the wealthiest man ever? Look at this list and choose something, and I'll delivery it to you for your birthday."
      The curly haired wheat blond looked at the Z-Tab's screen, lips rich and red as she silently pronounced the items. While she did this her free hand dipped between her breasts to retrieve a small sprayer of perfume, refreshing her alluring smell. Big didn't notice this initially, nor the three other women doing the same thing. As for Albert, he was already back in the kitchen to dish up the dinner he cooked. The fresh application of perfume was a bit too much for Big, yet he was held fast by the woman he knew as Bonnie Sue, her partially exposed breasts pressing up against his neck and chin. "Hmm. Gold bars. I like those," said the petite woman, looking down at the 4'8" man. Then her voice changed. "I like permsteel bars better, especially when criminals like you are kept behind them." He knew that voice, but before with reactions slowed due to the sensation of breast flesh touching him, the woman nutted him on the forehead like a rough patch footballer. Falling flat on his butt, Big looked up to see a pair of intense green eyes staring back down at him. "Big," said the woman, "you're under arrest!"

14
"Oh, is that so?" Big said in a suave tone as he got up and rubbed his forehead. Ninon and Jolie, having gotten behind Big, now moved to either side of Hanna at the prompt of a subtle hand gesture. "What's the charge, Detective Wilcox?"
      In a deft move the disguised police woman tore off her plastiskin mask and wig, its previous tenacious hold broken by the neutralizing agent applied just moments earlier. It might as well have been the goddess Athena that burned its righteous visage into Big's retinas. "Kidnapping, for one, and considering your age and of your friends involved we'll add contributing to the delinquency of minors."
      The other three escorts removed their masks and wigs as well, showing two faces Big expected and one he did not. "Well, I suppose I should count myself lucky that Amber isn't here. She would've wrecked the joint." He grinned at the woman between the now revealed June and Nadia. "Patty, long time no see. How are your two granddaughters doing? They must be leading rather physically active lifestyles to go through so many sports bras."
      "You would be keeping tabs on them," said Patricia, looking far more like a tigress than a police captain. "Then you know they're engaged in Home Guard training, ultimately to become police officers. When they do, there'll be one less piece of trash for them to deal with. Now, you and your four boyfriends get on your knees, hands on your heads." From the side of her dress Patricia pulled off a length of plastic. Far from being a decoration, it was a zip tie that worked in lieu of regular handcuffs.
      "No such doing, you toothless crone. Not unless you want Ryan to be blinded for life. I've been around long enough to know that boobie blindness is an actual condition. Once he sees Hanna in her present state he'll never get his sight back, even if he gets cybernetic eyes. The vision, the memory of his wife being a mammary goddess will be the only thing his mind will register, forever." Big snapped his fingers, sending Ninon and Jolie into action. Their prowess in rollerskating had improved so much that they were able to lift Ryan out of Hanna's cleavage without falling. They turned him around to face Hanna, his face tight from the strain to keep his eyes closed. "Remember, Ryan," Big taunted, "don't look at the ark! As for you and your pneumatic noobs, Patty, I know for a fact you're not carrying stunners as the security scanners would've detected them. My friends here are competent martial art fighters, despite their appearances. The girls too, thanks to those self-defenses classes they've taken to fend off horny little beasts like me." He smiled while the officers grated, licking his lips during the brief pause. "Now, be good little girl scouts and strip to your whitey-tighties. Once we tie you up with those zip ties I'll take my party to another of my lairs here on Outback. If you ask nicely, I just might leave Hanna and Ryan in the same kind of place I found them - in an ice cave. With so much boob to offer I'm sure Hanna can keep Ryan warm until help arrives."
      "Fat chance, you freak," said a righteous June. "You'll need all the help you can get." When she spoke again it was as if a student took on a dare over a school's PA system. "Rumpelstiltskin's nut sack!"
      For Carolyn, Ninon and Jolie hearing that phrase was like being caught up in a rapture, faces wide upon receiving what to them was word from on high. It then passed, and they looked at themselves and their ultrabuxom chests, touching them in an attempt to disbelieve. Then they looked at Big, which was enough to dispel all doubt. "Oh, God, I can't believe I've spent a week as one of Big's bedroom bunnies!" Carolyn cried. She put a hand under one shirt-covered breast and attempted to give it a good shake. She might as well have tried to lift a sack of corn meal. "If it wasn't for this bra I'd be pinned to the floor by these boulders!"
      Ninon started to cry. "I actually let that talking prune run his hands all over my body! I don't think they make water hot enough to get his grimy prints off me!"
      "Hey! I'm not grimy!" said Big defensively.
      Then it was Jolie's turn, tears welling up in her eyes. "I can't believe we all made out with Tomas, that Dai Yuki reading loser, and in his own office no less! Plus the karaoke with Big! It was like performing Advance Australia Fair with vuvuzelas! Now we'll never find husbands!"
      Big threw up his hands in frustration. "Why do women keep saying that! Honestly, do you all have the same script? How do figure out what words to say to break my spell over them?"
      "A lady never tells," spoke Lynnae. She pointed to the four seated men. "Now, get on your knees, hands on your heads."
      From behind Nadia came a distinct, low volume growling. She turned to find it was Pumpkin, Big's pet miniature doxie. The hair on the back of the rotund bitch was up, and its snarling revealed immaculately cared-for teeth. "Hey, Pumpkin, no need for that," Nadia said in a soothing voice as she got down on one knee, arms out as if to give a hug. "How can you be nasty to a doxie lover like me? Be a good girl and..." She didn't finish for the little dog bolted right into the yawning cleavage that presented itself and proceeded to rip apart the dress from the inside like it was made from strips of bacon.
      The distraction was enough for the four BCCI men to get up and start fighting the other three officers. From the way they fought it was clear Big gave them some pointers for in quick order June, Lyn and Patricia were wearing tatters with generous amounts of skin along with bras and panties being exposed. However, just as quick, the foursome were making friends with the floor, eventually sporting huge bruises on their faces from when Lyn and June used their busts as fleshy blackjacks. For Patricia it was an eye-opening experience, for it was one thing to read a report that described how suspects were subdued by Lyn and June and seeing it performed first hand.
      As for Nadia she had no desire to harm Pumpkin, despite the number the attacking dog had done to her dress. The rampage only ended when her passive 'ware sensors picked up a high-pitch sound, identified as a dog whistle. Pumpkin dashed right for the kitchen, going through the doggie flap with such speed as to give a greyhound pause. Now freed, Nadia assisted Patricia in bringing down two pugilists that chose the senior woman as their opponent. The very tall woman slammed one of the men on the floor like a slab of meat on a tenderizing board. After hog-tying her opponent Lyn looked around the room. "Big's gone! Where did he go?"
      "He went to the master bedroom, there!" Hanna pointed to the open door. During the fighting Ryan had knelt down and hugged her right breast as if he were a shipwrecked sailor. Carolyn, Ninon and Jolie were huddled together in their best effort to make a group hug, tears running down their faces and dripping down onto their shirt-covered busts.
      Lyn gave the door a severe look. She kicked off her high heals and dashed into the master bedroom, prompting Patricia to follow and leaving Nadia and June to finish up. When she got there Lyn was gone, but looking up at the ceiling showed a circular opening next to the doors that lead to the private subway transit shaft. Going under it, the police captain felt herself being drawn up and then accelerated, realizing that it was emergency grav tube. Next stop would be a secret garage for Big's remarkable Supercar. Patricia had no doubt about that, but she hoped to get to Lynnae before something regrettable happened.

********

There was indeed a private garage, and if one was sufficiently patient and methodical they would see that it wasn't the 'emergency assembly room for rooftop pickup' as listed in the blueprints. That the two emergency grav tubes that terminated in the garage only served Big's suite was a well kept secret until now. Still, they served Big's purpose when it counted. With Albert and Pumpkin having reached Supercar just a moment earlier Big was about to do the same when a stealth-cloaked figure, the one that deduced the true purpose of the room, moved away from the pillar he blended in with. Big, with adrenaline augmenting his already heighten senses, spun and delivered a vicious kick into the wavering image behind him. Now there was a crumpled, nearly unnoticeable mass on the floor, unmoving like a pile of laundry.
      The moment Big spent silently gloating in victory could've been better spent, for at the other end of the garage came hellish sounds that raised goosebumps on the little master criminal. Padding into view was Smudge, dim lights reflecting off the eyes gave the exceptional dog a most vicious visage to match the soul-burning growls. "Oh, hi, Smudge," Big said, absolutely still. "Good doggie. Nice doggie. You're not still mad at me for wanting to have your hide as part of a fur coat?" There was no way Albert was going to open a door to let him in the car now, especially since he knew how fast the ratdog could run. Big motioned with his head at the prone figure on the floor. "That guy must be Harold. Sorry about that." That prompted Smudge to bark so loud as to hurt Big's ears, and the echoing did nothing for his nerves.
      Big fished a Snuffles doggie treat from his housecoat pocket and tossed it at Smudge. He hoped the smell alone would distract the terror dog long enough for him to get to the car. The Snuffles tidbit landed at the dog's paw. Not a single flinch of the head, blinking of the eyes or action of the nostrils came from Smudge, pushing away the doggie treat like it was a ball. Smudge was slowly stepping forward, and just a moment from sprinting and delivering a world of hurt on the man that had in the past harmed his mistress.
      Out of options, Big brought out the crude bat puppet from his pocket and tossed it at Smudge. At that instant the dog transferred his animal rage from the man to the foul mouth construct known as Victory. Now freed from the specter of being mauled again by the only animal he was afraid of Big dove for the now open passenger door even as the garage door opened and Albert coaxed Supercar forward. "Go!" Big yelled as he landed on the seat, pushed back the by sudden acceleration and thus didn't see Lyn's arrival in the garage, quickly followed by Patricia.
      "Damn, he got away!" Lyn said as she hit the now closed garage door. Travel in the tube had removed all the remaining tattered clothing, leaving her just clad in a bra, panties, stockings and garter belt. Patricia, now at the side of a visible but still unconscious Harold Watkins, was just as adorned as her subordinate. Well, almost. "Ah, Captain, I've been meaning to ask something. Last night at the Bush Telly. You seemed a bit... larger than usual. And as you have lectured me and June in the past, that bra isn't regulation issue."
      With just one-third cups holding to the breasts with adhesive gel and no straps Patricia's bra was something one would expect on a woman one-fifth her age. However she had five times the experience and the justified confidence to wear such an abbreviated undergarment. "Your detective eye doesn't miss a thing, Lyn. Me and my husband had planned to go to Summerdales for our winter vacation, but at the last minute the Commissioner tapped me to coordinate security with the Marshals Office. This, of course, happened right after I had nanites enlarge me from a D to an F just for the vacation, and having purchased the dress and related accessories." She smiled like an aunt that caught a niece stealing cookies from the kitchen. "Now, how about that little number on your ladybumps?" She pointed to the solid bottom, flower pedal lacy top melon manager Lyn wore. "That's not regulation issue either."
      Lyn blushed, teasing a bra strap as she helped Patricia bring Harold up to his feet, a sharp moan revealing his return to consciousness. "I'll save you the trouble. It's a Christmas gift from Paul, based on a strong suggestion from my grandma. This is the first time I worn something like this, and June's gonna keep asking questions once she sees it. So between you, me and the angels this bra use to belong to my mother, and Felicity happened to find it while clearing her closets for a clothing drive. That'll shut June up."
     "Agreed, as long as you keep mum about what I said."
      "Boy howdy, that Big kicks like a mule," Harold said once he found his voice. "I'll keep your girlie secrets, just so long as you don't make me pinky-promise."
      "If you tell, then I'll finish what Big started," Lynnae chided, helping the short-stepping man to the grav tube.

********

With the Captain having gone after Lynnae it fell to June, being senior to Nadia, to take charge of the crime scene. First she had the four BCCI men hauled out and brought in the CSI team, including Tobias for electronics support, to process the suite. The three antique store girls were taken away for questioning and to be reunited with their families. One thing, though, was taken care of immediately. Four housecoats and a blanket were brought in by Paul, and he was on hand when Lyn and Patricia arrived with Harold in tow.
      Nadia immediately went to her husband and embraced him like a serviceman returning home from war. "You had to prove yourself macho by taking on Big alone, hubby. You're lucky it was only a kick to the gut."
      "Keep hugging me like that and you'll be adding fractured ribs." Harold followed with a quick peck on the cheek. "I had to follow a hunch, and I very well couldn't bring a full squad with me. All I could afford was Smudge. Too bad he got distracted, otherwise we would've had Big."
      Nadia returned Harold's kiss. "With Big there's always a next time."
      Now clad in a housecoat that made her subordinates think she was about to get a cup of morning coffee Patricia went up to June, also clad in an ankle-length garment. "Good work, detective. The suspects have been read their rights and are being processed, the girls are released from Big's control and the Woosters are safe. All that's left is to get a proper set of clothes."
      June shook her head. "If only it was that simple, Captain. Ryan opened his eyes before we could get the goggles back on him. Even when we did his sight didn't come back. We even tried what Hanna suggested, still no good."
      Patricia raised an eyebrow. "What Hanna suggested?"
      By teasing a lock of hair it was clear June was embarrassed. "It's what Ryan and Hanna did at the museum. Hanna held Ryan's head between her breasts for a ten-count. It was also what Nancy Wilcox did back on Antigua over 400 years ago."
      "Ah, that's nothing to be blushing about," said Lyn as she came up and patted June on the back. "You did that for all your boyfriends. Don't tell me Greg hasn't...."
      "Now is not the time for one of your famous buddy exchanges," Patricia broke in. "Lyn, why don't you see if your Wilcox charms can heal Ryan."
      "Me? Not that I won't give it try, Captain, but if it didn't work for June and Nadia with their basketballs then..."
      Patricia placed a firm hand on Lyn's shoulder, looking like the wise grandmother she actually was. "You're the direct descendant of Nancy Wilcox, so there's the chance that in his mind he will overcome his blindness if he's treated to your bosom. It is a woman's duty to protect a man's pride. Having beaten the odds to emerge alive in our time it would be a grave injustice should he spend his new life blinded."
      With nodded consent Lyn turned and walked over to the Woosters. It was during this attempt to restore Ryan's sight that Smudge finally made his appearance. In his mouth was the tattered remains of the crude bat puppet known as Victory. Like Smudge had done may times before with actual critters he laid Victory at the feet of Nadia, sat up on his haunches and whined to be picked up. "You did the best you could, you rat," Nadia said affectionately as she brought Smudge up so he could plant a lick to the chin. Then, like the exaggerated antics of a cartoon dog, Smudge sniffed Nadia loudly, from her face, neck and chest. He fidgeted, whined, and then made a long, mourning howl that would do a coyote proud.
      "What's he howling about?" Harold said, watching as Smudge continued, front paws firmly on Nadia's covered bosom.
      "I have a pretty good idea," said the sienna-hued woman as she sympathetically stroked Smudge's back.

********

"What course, Big?" It was Albert, piloting Supercar at moderate speed in the Outback night. With its stealth abilities, not to mention certain viral software programs in Outback's aerial surveillance network that ensured Supercar stayed undetected, the unusual vehicle made its customary getaway with no pursuit.
      In the backseat Big was brooding. Only by petting Pumpkin, curled up on his lap, did he find some comfort. "To our Melbourne wilderness house, Albert. For the first time in decades we'll be having a blue balls New Year's Eve. No thanks to those goody-goody cops. My mind-control bra caper earlier this month may have been foiled, but knowing the locations of my hidden Earth treasure caches more than makes up for that." He tapped his head for emphasis. "I don't need that Z-Tab or memory chip anymore. I got all I need in this noodle of mine."
      "That's assuming they didn't break the encryption on the chip, Big," Albert amended.
      "If they could," Big snorted. "Give me credit for at least remembering the password." Leaning back in his seat Big went over the past day's events in his mind again. He recalled the Bush Telly immediately, especially Nadia's dress, and readily admitted to himself that Lynnae was pleasing to the eye, just like her grandmother. Hmmm, now that's a dish I want to know more about, he thought to himself. It would be a change of pace from all the young ones I had recently. Now that would steam up Lynnae's stir-fry if I got to know Felicity up close and personal!
      Pumpkin, up to now peacefully slumbering, awoke with such a start that it startled Big. She scrambled up Big's chest, over his shoulder, and onto the back seat ledge. There, looking out the rear window, she howled a lonesome tune that would've been at home in the American Southwest.
      "Silly little dog," Big commented. He saw that New Ayer's Rock, Outback's moon, was full and high in the night sky behind him. "Howling at the moon, and a blue one at that. Fits perfectly with what I said about blue balls."

Epilogue
In a private terminal at the Nancy-Bird Walton Spaceport the Woosters were making their good-byes to Lynnae and her friends. It was now January 20st, 2417. Three weeks had passed since the night in Big's luxury suite. In that time Mr. Big received another disappointment. Tobias had broken the encryption on the treasure file, finding the locations of no less than seven caches of Big's ill-gotten loot hidden on Earth. One of them held the contents of the Lost Dutchman Mine and the infamous Oak Island Money Pit. For his part Tobias was awarded the Distinguished Service Medal and never had to pay for lunches at the Ocker Hoagie from that day on.
      The Woosters received many gifts from Outback citizens with the most treasured of all coming from Nadia and Harold. What they presented was a 1-year-old basset hound called Baxter. The most lovable dog came from a pack belonging to a friend of Harold's, and with Smudge providing assistance the one that best suited the famous couple was selected. It was obvious that Baxter took some pointers from Smudge, sticking his snout into Ryan's ear and planting kisses on Hanna's face like she was a lollipop. Well trained, the dog sat by Hanna's side, alert and watchful for his new family.
      Ryan was found to be cured of his boobie blindness for good. He said a rapturous feeling filled him when he placed his head between Lynnae's breasts. It was as if an angel kissed his eyes, he told the blushing detective, prompting June to say her friend, while somewhat of a dirty angel, did have a lovely pair. Lyn replied that if Greg saw his girlfriend in her current set of undergarments then he would conclude June was a very dirty angel to sport a lusting pair. Patricia put a stop to further banter as to preserve the moment for the Woosters as they kissed and embraced in celebration.
      Tomas Brownstone, for being in possession of several illegal obtained historical items (Albert had followed through on his threat), was given two years probation. He also had to hire three new employees as Carolyn, Ninon and Jolie quit and found new jobs at The Tea Cup. In short order the trio earned enough to have nanite breast reduction, all of them obtaining uniform volleyball busts in honor of their heroine Lynnae Wilcox. The four businessmen ended up in court and received twenty year sentences, their reputations rightfully ruined for joining Big's criminal enterprise and engaging in unlawful acts that brought them to the attention of Big in the first place. As for the photo of Nancy and Jordan that concerned Lyn and June it did appear in the New Darwin Sun but as part of a story listing the defeats handed to Mr. Big over the centuries by the officers' ancestors.
      "The one thing I don't get," said Ryan after hugging June, "is why you chose to be disguised as escorts instead of using all sorts of futuristic SWAT tactics."
      With folded arms under her coat-clad bust it looked as if June was protecting two large puppies from the elements. "It would've been too dangerous to use breaching tactics or gas. Big's suite was built like a fortress. We had to capitalize on his weakness for women. For the past three years the NDPD had an undercover operation in the escort service used by the Outback Mob and Mr. Big. When he ordered the services of four escorts that match the general physical requirements of me, Lyn, Nadia and Patty we decided that rescuing you and Hanna was worth the loss of whatever future potential may have come from the operation."
      Paul shook hands with Ryan after giving Hanna the best hug possible under the circumstances. "We're sad to see you go. I hope it's not because of Mr. Big."
      "Oh, heaven's no, Paul. From what you told me he's not going to throw bad money after even more bad money. Me and Hanna just want to be in a place where it's warm all the time. That island settlement on Lagoon, Pearl City, is perfect for us. It doesn't get cooler than 21 Celsius at night, a sheltered bay, expansive beaches..."
      "And," Hanna broke in so that Ryan wouldn't sprain his tongue, "70 percent of the island's residents are police, fire fighters, and Commonwealth Marines retirees. With so many people looking out after us Big with have to be a complete madman to try to kidnap me again."
      Captain Patricia Laramie nodded approval. "My former captain lives in Pearl City. In fact she's the mayor, and glad that you accepted her community's invitation. I suppose once you're settled in you'll take care of your other medical needs?" A wink of the eye from the senior woman made the Woosters blush.
      "That's true, Patty. Me and Ryan will hold off getting those life extension treatments until we're settled with our new house, and after the baby has finished breast feeding."
      "Don't count on your forthcoming ankle biter to shrink those mastiffs," Nadia said with wit. Smudge, head poking out of his mistresses' cleavage, made a low woof of agreement. "You'll still need breast reduction nanites to finish the job."
      Hanna ran her hand over the clothed expanse of her chest. The effect of the Bubbles drink had finally petered out, and instead of adding 10 inches as Big figured it was 18, giving the 5'7" woman a 170" bust. As for her pregnancy it was a happy outcome of Ryan and Hanna's reunion. After celebrating New Years with Lyn and her friends the Woosters spend two uninterrupted days in an even more exclusive suite in Victoria Tower. Evidently they decided to live in the present and not dwell on the past, and having a baby was the best way to accomplish that. "I think I'll time it so that when the baby is a year old I'll be back at my old F-cup self."
      "Have you considered going back to Earth, even for a visit?" Tobias asked the question everyone had on their mind.
      Ryan held Hanna's hand and put the other on her shoulder. "Having been removed from Human history for 404 years I think the Earth can go on without us for another 15. When we do visit, it'll be with our children, and we'll be experiencing Earth again for the first time."
     A pair of Commonwealth Marshals and a quartet of skycaps arrived. With waves and sayings of good luck and fortune the detectives watched as the Woosters were escorted to the shuttle that would take them to the orbiting starliner. "You know," Lyn said to the others, "I've been thinking on what to call ourselves. Against a criminal such as Mr. Big we need a name that will distinguish ourselves in the history of crime fighting."
      June rubbed her chin. "Hmm. Very well can't call ourselves 5-0 or the Untouchables. Not to mention Bart's Bastards or the Blue Ball Busters."
      "No doubt we gave Big a case of blue balls," Lyn mused. She then snapped her fingers. "I got it. Simple and memorable. Why don't we call ourselves Blue Team?"
      "That's something I can cotton to." June smiled. "If everyone else agrees, let's shake on it."

END